Skift offers an opinion piece framed as the customer isn’t always right suggesting hotels need to crack down on bad behavior. But the message isn’t really about hotels versus the customer, it’s which customer is right?
In other words, as guests let it all hang out, it’s the rest of the hotel’s customers who suffer. Those customers aren’t getting their money’s worth from a luxury establishment, because the guests traipsing through the lobby in swimsuits or heading to breakfast in their bathrobes make the hotel experience not luxury.
The hotel invests in an entire aesthetic – from its architecture to the decor of its rooms – and has that creation dashed by the aesthetic of other guests.
- Formal attire isn’t required
- And most hotels wouldn’t have customers at all if they only welcomed the beautiful people
- But self-indulgent guests imposing externalities on everyone else staying at a property degrade the whole experience and scare away repeat business, “it’s the kind of place where…”
This Hyatt Regency Amsterdam guest was standing out in the January cold in his bathrobe, smoking not-a-cigarette.
This gentleman at the Westin Siray Bay in Phuket came down to breakfast in his bathrobe, and sat with too-wide-a-stance.
And was this really necessary at the Royal Palms in Scottsdale?
Héctor Elizondo’s hotel manager may have been ultimately charmed by Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman but his first reaction was the correct one: “Things that go on in other hotels don’t happen at the Regent Beverly Wilshire.”
You may be seated in a high-end hotel lounge, ensconced in a refined atmosphere, and it’s interrupted by another guest’s loud FaceTime call. Or picture a five-star dining room where athleisure has become as common as formal attire. Public spaces have been transformed into personal living rooms, including guests in their underwear or worse.
There are hotels where this is fine! But each brand needs to know who its customers are, and what it’s trying to achieve, and then take a firmer stance upholding the standards it settles on. That’s how to enhance the experience for everyone, and improve business.
Skift notes that Hôtel du Cap prominently displays house rules in each room and enforces dress codes to preserve its elegant atmosphere. By setting clear standards and enforcing them with finesse, the hotel ensures that individual behavior doesn’t overshadow the collective experience. That’s not something most hotels can or should do, but there are minimums that ought to apply many other places.
A casual, beachfront resort might allow more relaxed attire, while a luxury city hotel may politely enforce a more formal dress code. The key is clear communication, setting expectations both before and during the guest’s stay, and ensuring that any enforcement is handled with tact and respect.
Guests and hotels working together to create an atmosphere of mutual respect and consideration can significantly elevate the overall experience. A silent majority of hotel guests likely appreciate higher standards of behavior for other guests, whether they realize it or not, because it affects the background experience the property can deliver.
I will add that enforcement around polite tech use and children’s behavior really needs to be a consideration for luxury properties. While at the very beautiful Stock Exchange in Manchester UK a few weeks ago, we tried to quietly enjoy a meal at their new restaurant helmed by a celebrated chef. Instead, we got to hear episodes of Peppa Pig on blast from one table. Another table appeared to be owners or executive staff on a video call without headphones and no food on the table, like it was their office. No staff did anything. The beautiful setting was ruined.
Environment and decorum and respect for others really matters. I won’t pay 5* prices to sit in what amounts to a kids club environment while at a Michelin chef’s restaurant in a five star hotel.
A very talkative group of American male buddies were at table near me the other day and agreeing with each other that the women at the high end resorts in Europe just aren’t as attractive as they used to be. The complaint seemed to also touch upon there being less topless suntanning going on than there used to be at these resorts and that the topless guests weren’t the ones they wanted to see topless.
People are little piggies, they’re ignorant, and lack self-esteem. “Look at me” they say. Yeah, we’re looking at you for sure. And we wish you’d decamp to the nearest motel with a number in its name where you belong. These are the bums that appear in public looking like … bums. Hotels should enforce rules like getting dressed for breakfast, what’s so difficult with saying “Sorry, sir, you’ll need to get dressed”. The bums are too dumb to figure it out for themselves.
I see nothing wrong with wearing the hotel’s robe around the property. I recall the high end Hyatt in Kyoto, forget which one, even encouraging it. Very relaxing and comfortable.
Why is the Scottdales patron face blocked out and the Phuket one not? May as well shame all or none…
@GUdimwit
What a contrived and insignificant attempt to hate on Americans, as all you leftists love to do. Yes, how dare those men be heterosexual. Do you pee sitting down? How about get on board your party’s climate change agenda and stop traveling? Oh wait, carbon emissions is just a problem when it’s the unwashed masses.
And then there is racism Kevin.
I have had a Conrad tell me I can’t come into the lounge in trousers , shirt and leather sandals and a minute later welcome a white person in shorts and bright yellow sports shoes
Mantis is off his prejudicial rocker as usual when he’s not busy whipping himself or others into a frenzy about Americans’ pets disappearing into the stomachs of Haitian immigrants in Ohio.
Some of those American guys are friends of mine, and there is nothing contrived about the actual conversation and my being involved in it. :rolleyes:
And also on the topic about hotels having “guest standards” on display that have changed over time, can’t say I have noticed any massive increase in people coming to hotel restaurants dressed any more “inappropriately” than 30-40 years ago. Except now you get a lot more female guests of various ages coming into hotel restaurants and being in hotel lobbies with derrière-hugging attire that gets jaws dropping with tongue-wagging or eyes rolling from the easily aroused and morality police (if even different).
Suhas is completely right in indicating that there is too often a racist dimension to policing the attire or even behavior of customers.
A “white” British tourist in a string bikini walking into a higher end Omani hotel off the beach won’t be confronted by the hotel over attire while a South Asian woman in a short skirt and low cut blouse coming in the front door gets stopped for being “inappropriate”.
You knew it would only take a NY minute before the race card came out.
I think wearing robes outside your room is disgusting.
In a spa, ok, but not to the spa
But at breakfast, just no.
This includes cruise ships. Keep your robe in your room.
How hard is it to get dressed?
Ah, race. The arguing point for those too ignorant to critically think for themselves. For those infected with “identify politics syndrome”, perhaps there should be hotels specifically and exclusively for each racial group?
I slightly agree with the race aspect of it. At least, it should be viewed with caution, can we say that?
I’m all in favor of a dress code and house rules. In the past, they were used as facade to enforce racial bias, but that need not be the case today. As long as we’re vigilant about it.
And it’s not a matter of money either. Several years ago a footballer was denied entry in to the Ritz club in London because he was wearing sneakers in violation of the dress code. He loudly protested that they were £900 shoes, etc. but he was turned away nonetheless. He could have gotten in with a $50 pair of dress shoes from Target.
Finally, I’m relieved to see support of this idea. I was expecting a lot of “I just want to be comfortable” nonsense, but thankfully that has not been the case.
What about “inappropriate” hairstyles, visible tattoo, various visible body piercings and other bodily adornment/accessories choices?
Clothing choices aren’t the only way in which some people “let it all hang out” in ways that may make some hotel guests uncomfortable.
Where will this all end? The next think you’ll be telling me is I have to dress “properly” to fly in F! 😉
Last cruise we took was Norwegian. Yes, it’s a casual line but people came to dinner in cut off jeans and dirty t-shirts. We won’t do it again. Remember when you used to get dressed up to take a plane ride? Look at pictures from 60 years ago and people wore suits to baseball games. Not advocating for that but some degree of respect is necessary. I heartily approve to exclusive places setting standards and, as you said, communicating them.
For when you don’t to be completely dressed for the day, pack something comfortable and loose fitting that will pass. For me that is black lounge pants that double as pajama pants.
These comments regarding race are ludicrous. It’s incredibly well known that the most likely race and nationality to misbehave in public are obviously the luxembourgish.
So many entitled slobs out there. The Delta SlobClub is a perfect example with all of the cred card Carls and Carlas.
The gentleman complaining about racism might think there’s a distinction between sandals and covered shoes. No one wants to see another’s toes at dinner.
Some standards have slipped others have risen in public. Who remembers when shirts off was pretty common at baseball games and public places during the summer. Which gave rise to the ‘no shoes, no shirt, no service’ mantra.
I would like to think, Dan the Man, that the person was turned out for being stupid enough to spend 900 pounds on sneakers.
My wife and I continually remark as to how we would not allow our daughters to wear jeans at a nice hotel. Now, we go to 4 or 5 star resorts and remark as to how half of the guests dress like homeless people. Hotels are not willing to enforce dress codes, for fear of alienating a guest. But, how many other guests are offended by the lack of a dress code in a nice property? How do you justify dumbing down the resort while maintaining high fees?
Kirk hasn’t noticed that a lot of the high-end, high-heeled dress shoes that women fawn over for formal wear are open toe shoes? Or is a kind of attire or accessory only appropriate for people of a certain category but not appropriate for people of other categories? By the way, some sandals are closed-toe sandals.
Maybe the “fancy schmancy” places should dress their guests in unisex uniforms? I hope not, as that seems like what could be expected from a communist enterprise.
It is happening in all cultures by individuals of all cultures. The HOTELS are the ones to blame: they have chosen revenue over standards. I was in a restaurant at the Savoy in London. Everyone was dressed appropriately . . . except a group of 20-somethings, who were in t-shirts (under-vestments) and blue jeans. And, they were living large and loud. When asked, management said they wanted to accommodate certain guests. We have not been back since. It’s not a matter of being a snob. Having class has nothing to do with price tag. It’s a matter of wanting a particular experience for dinner out with your wife . . . and that experience is no longer what it had been.
Separately, I can tell how many times I’ve seen couples out where the woman is dressed quite nicely and the man is dressed like a slob. How disrespectful of the lady.
Such a good topic. I think the reason this is changing is because standards are changing. A woman can dress in a beautiful dress with sneakers and in most circles that is the outfit and they absolutely fit in as well dressed. Same with the athleisure and wearing designer jeans. But everybody knows that these people are “done up” and trendy. They are wearing the trendy brands and they have makeup on and their hair is done just so. The problem is when a non fashionable onlooker sees that somebody is wearing jeans or sneakers and then wants to come in like that too. Now they are not fashionable. Instead of having their hair done, they are just lazy and under dressed. But if sneakers are a style how do you explain to the non fashionable person they can’t come in? I think that is where the breakdown is. Nightclubs have no problem enforcing this rule. They only let the beautiful, well dressed people in.
And then there is handling with finesse as another commenter suggested. So one important thing is to emphasize the dress code ahead of time. Make sure everybody knows in advance. I will tell you working with the general public even if you think you have told somebody something over and over again there are people that will mess up. And now comes the finesse. When I was a kid we ate at a restaurant that required slacks and jackets. We were not prepared. The restaurant simply at the hostess desk handed my uncle a pair of pants and my dad got handed a jacket. They were both brown and old and threadbare. They both didn’t match. They both didn’t fit. The pants fit the waist but were approx 6 inches too short. But without saying anything or making any body feel bad they were now properly dressed and we all got to enjoy the restaurant. I still remember it today from about 30 years ago.
But the situation was handled well. Would this work today? There are so many customers of size that I doubt you could have enough clothing. And there would probably be somebody from gen z who would throw a fit.
Even the most “we are super-selective” “exclusive” nightclubs allow in some people in questionable attire. Money and fame — including related media coverage in gossip sections — talk at such places too as the owners/operators want. And this is nothing new. Been going on for as long as we’ve been alive. And what is considered “trendy” or “fashionable” can definitely even be some of the same people’s idea and many other people’s idea of “trashy” or sloppy” depending on who is at the entrance.
Then there are yoga pants and the who, when and where shouldn’t. Not a complaint some cases, just an observation.
This post shows racism against asians is still alive and well.
Why hide one identity but not another?
Why choose these images out of thousands available to illustrate your point?
Do better Gary.
@David Slown – only one of three images is of an Asian hotel guest. Only one of four guests in the photos is Asian. So I’m genuinely confused by your take. Maybe you think that the photo of the guest from behind is Asian (he’s not), maybe you’re just stereotyping?
This article is perfect for the old adage…STFU and mind your own damn business. If a property takes issue with the behavior of a guest, the appropriate rep will handle it.
Are you kidding? This article is a little snobby. Just the way you like a place to be. The 1960’s are gone and so is formal attire in all but a handful of places. Why in earth did you stare long enough to snap pictures of him in different positions? His robe was poor judgment/taste but it shouldn’t reflect on the property.
I prefer the group of people in jeans and T-shirts who quietly go about their business in a luxury hotel or restaurant over the formally dressed person or group who allow everyone to listen in on their FaceTime call without headphones or are so obnoxiously loud in their conversation that they drown out any conversation with your friends.
I agree tacky should not be allowed even in a 3* establishment. There’s a time, place and occasion for everything. But in this “I have a right to express myself no matter how obnoxiously and don’t you dare say anything against it” world, a minority of braying idiots is ruining it for the majority who knows when and what to wear and how to behave in public without attracting a lot of negative attention.
It amazes me how luxury hotels have so much phone noise (kids watching videos & playing video games, and adults talking on speaker phones, & watching videos without headsets). Amplified sounds should be firmly banned. Dress codes are more nuanced, but zero tolerance to speaker mode is black and white.
Staff are more concerned about their jobs than protecting the atmosphere. Thus, I’m constantly needing to ask people to STFU. It takes away from the experience and makes me want to avoid hotels in general and retreat to private spaces. Especially applies to breakfasts and club lounges.
My Hotel Top 10 List….
1. Eating food while still standing over the buffet. Dropping your crumbs back on the food offerings. Can’t you wait 10 seconds to get back to your seat.
2. Using your dirty dishes at a buffet. Using your dirty utensils to take food from a buffet.
3. Making a buffet at your personal table of food from the buffet. This means taking piles of food back to your table to enjoy family style. Unfortunately I see mountains of food left on people’s tables when they leave. Please take only what you need. Do 4 people really need 8 bagles and 15 sausages 5 oranges 2 kilos of eggs?
4. Hiding the complementary alcohol bottles so you can come back and drink it after the happy hours end. (Marriott Glasgow) 🙁
5. Letting your kids tip over furniture in the Executive Lounge and take the entire tray of desserts back to their table….then thowing most of them in the garbage.
6. Touching your personal water bottle to the spigot of the fruit infused water in the lobby. Nobody wants your germs!
7. Sending your kids out to play in the hall at hotel because they are making too much noise in your room.
8. Letting your kids touch buffet food with their hands…and then put the food back.
9. You’ve had a lovely evening out and decide to have a discussion with another couple …..outside my door at 11:45pm…. Theres a lobby for that.
10. Am I the only one who says Good Morning..Afternoon Evening in an elevator ?
It’s kind of crazy that we have reached the point where we have to explain why you shouldn’t do this in public vs you can’t do this. Their excuse of “well it’s not against the law /rules” demonstrates how screwed up people’s logic have become. Nobody should have to explain to you why you shouldn’t be in your short robes during breakfast with 200 other people.
This pretty much sums up the world in general. We’ve been in a regression not progressing. We used to strive to dress more formal to care enough about ourselves and others to present our best foot forward. And now we go out in underwear and IDGAF. We used to strive to learn to read and be well read. And now no one reads at all. We used to strive to uphold decorum and value tradition for remembering where we came from, where we’re headed, and how far we need to go, now we dismantle anything and everything without considering whether it wise, prudent, necessary, nor what to fill the void with. We are post-peak as a society and now are just regressing to debased and degenerate.
….but I am a Diamond Guest…..I will wear my yoga pants and kimono to the restaurant if I want to….and I will take 1000 Instagram pics to prove I was there.
@GUWonder: Open-toed shoes are allowed *IF* the feet are manicured. You’re not going to see a woman in heels whose feet are in the same condition as most men.
At high end restaurants, I would rather the restaurants ban photos than ban attire. People taking photos of the inside of restaurants and of the food during meal times is more of an issue than people coming in bathrobes and letting loose their eccentric inner Howard Hughes or Hugh Hefner.
In America, some government buildings have a plaque at the entrance which says something like, “Conduct and attire shall be consistent with the intended use of this facility.” It speaks to expected norms and social sensibilities.
There are restaurants in which gym clothes are absolutely fine. And, then, there are restaurants in which gym clothes are not absolutely fine. Last night, I was in a moderately priced restaurant here in London in which gym clothes are not. Everyone was dressed casually. Nice but nothing special. Except one woman seemingly in her late 20s, who was wearing gym shorts. Her attire was not consistent with the restaurant’s vibe. Indeed, the attire of the three other persons in her party was consistent. Her attire was inconsistent with that of her own party. It really doesn’t matter why. The failure was the restaurant’s management not saying “Sorry but . . . “
Hi Christopher R. There are definitely some women whose feet are just as bad or worse than most men’s. And while women definitely do spend way more time and money on average on foot care than men, it doesn’t always show in the results. Also, when it comes to open-toed shoes or sandals, they tend to stink less than closed-toe, non-sandal shoes — something that hits the olfactory receivers quite hard when some people take off their shoes under a table/chair or on a plane even when they come in wearing them.
I apologise in advance for having not a whit of race in my post.
Prior to the pandemic I was a top-level guest at Shangri-La hotels and the Kowloon Shangri-La in particuar. One day, when I was leaving, I had been for a walk, it rained, and my shoes got wet. Si I left them to dry and went to the Horizon Club for breakfast, properly attired but wearing my room slippers. Max, the club manager in the morning told me I could not be in the club in my slippers. I told him that my shoes were soaking wet so we compromised. I had to stay seated at a table where my slippers could not be seen and accept table service — no buffet for me!
I would be lying if I didn’t think it was mildly annoying at the time; now, I think it’s hilarious. And OK. BTW, The Horizon Club in Kowloon strictly enforced the NO CHILDREN policy in the evnings, and I am eternally grateful to them for that.
MANAGERS. Do NOT hire employees that refuse to enforce the rules.
I recently switched gyms because gym employees had no interest in enforcing the rules.
The same concept applies to hotels and other industries.
The sad truth is that some people don’t know how to behave and need to be told.
Interestingly, EVERY hotel in Japan that I stayed at on a recent month long trip, from midrange Japanese chains to high end international chains, had multiple signs in multiple languages stating that robes, swimwear, and loungewear were expressly forbidden in restaurants, bars, and lounges on property.
Clearly it’s an issue Japanese hoteliers have had to deal with, perhaps understandably, given how a yukata is normal attire for almost all activities in many ryokans, especially onsens.