At the risk of testing my new approach to comments: Two passengers were kicked off an Allegiant Airlines flight from Flint, Michigan to Florida. A flight attendant gave them a hard time for saying ‘penis’ after the flight had boarded.
They were asked to leave the aircraft before being told the reason for their removal. Police explained their choice of language wasn’t appropriate for the flight. As a consequence of the stiff penalty the man’s wife had to come pick up the man and his father-in-law.
“Finally the Flint police and the airport authority came over and said we were removed because I said the word ‘penis’ on board an airplane,” he said. “I meant it in no derogatory (way). I mean, it’s part of the male anatomy and we were literally kicked off an airplane in Flint and we had to drive.”
The passenger reports, though, that they weren’t the only ones removed, “there was another person who was intoxicated while a fourth person also threw up.” Because, well, Allegiant. And since it’s Allegiant there aren’t a lot of alternative flights to take. They were offered a Grand Rapids departure, but it wouldn’t get them to their destination in time so they scrapped the flight.
News reports haven’t mentioned which flight the passengers are on, suggesting only they were headed to Florida. From Flint Allegiant services Daytona Beach; Fort Lauderdale; Jacksonville; Orlando Sanford; Punta Gorda; Sarasota; and St. Pete. Many of those are served from Grand Rapids, also, of course not always on the same day.
Rather than the 13 year boy story that it’s merely “part of the male anatomy” I’d have said I was talking about how much I’d rather be flying to Pensacola instead and just using the airport code.
According to Allegiant Airlines,
When crew members instructed them to cease their unruly behavior, the passengers failed to comply. As a result, both were deplaned and reaccommodated to other flights..This decision was made with the utmost safety of our customers and crew members in mind. Unruly behavior from a passenger presents a safety risk. As I’m sure you are aware, failing to comply with a crew member’s instructions is a violation of FAA regulations. Allegiant does not tolerate disruptive, abusive, or unruly behavior of any kind.
Regular readers know I have the sense of humor of a 13 year old boy. And that dates to… when I was 13 in speech and debate class. That’s when I heard the story about a student at state speech finals performing a piece called “My Penis.” She was especially talented, so other coaches tried to get her disqualified. As my coach relayed to me, it was Lisa Allred Bloom, and her mother Gloria Allred was there to step in and defend her. My high school debate coach, then California state league president, refused to disqualify her ruling that “My Penis would rise or fall on its own merits.” (Lisa Allred would go on to become a star debater at UCLA, years before I’d join that team myself.)
(HT: Paul H)
The identities of the unruly passengers were later revealed to be Peter Johnson and Dick Hertz.
What a pisser……I’ll show myself out.
Love your lead in line to this piece…
An up-lifting story for travelers. Allegiant is facing stiff competition, but they still gave them a hard time, and got them off the plane. However, they were able to rise to the occasion, and found their way to Florida without winding up in the hole.
@Alan – hahahaha, that’s funny and very creative!!! You made my day!
Well done! I’m posting to FB so my friends can see it too! So what is the moral of this story? Don’t fly Allegiant if you’re feeling sick or like you’re going to use the P word? And now….vomitting in flight is considered “unruly” behavior. Gees. Next the no fly list! My uncle used to live in Flint. ANd doesn’t it just figure they’d be a flight headed to FL. That state is a magnet for unruly behavior types isn’t it?
Gary, just because you were on the UCLA debate team, don’t get cocky. (Buh-dump-bump)
@Gary: Double entendre titles like this and its comments that you want to censor? I would hand it to you were it not that I would be banned.
This thread brings me hap-piness!
@Alan You win the comment award!
When flying Allegiant Airlines, since passengers are prohibited from using free speech if they say “penis,” which synonym should passengers substitute? Some choices that come to mind might be,
member, phallus, weenie, cock, love rod, dick, male genitalia, manhood, heat-seeking moisture missile, dong, pecker, peter, prick, putz, shaft, tool, johnson, schlong, willy, or wood.
For the benefit of future Allegiant Airlines passengers, please share your favorite vocabulary recommendations. I think pilots would choose “joystick.”
What would’ve happened had someone started the “peanuts*” game in flight that we all enjoyed if you went to high school in the mid-90s til the early -00’s?
Johnson: [Noticing Dr. Evil’s spaceship on radar] Colonel, you better have a look at this radar.
Colonel: What is it, son?
Johnson: I don’t know, sir, but it looks like a giant–
Jet Pilot: Dick.
Dick: Yeah?
Jet Pilot: Take a look out of starboard.
Dick: Oh my God, it looks like a huge–
Bird-Watching Woman: Pecker.
Bird-Watching Man: [raising binoculars] Ooh, Where?
Bird-Watching Woman: Wait, that’s not a woodpecker, it looks like someone’s–
Army Sergeant: Privates! We have reports of an unidentified flying object. It has a long, smooth shaft, complete with–
Baseball Umpire: Two balls.
[looking up from game]
Baseball Umpire: What is that. It looks just like an enormous–
Chinese Teacher: Wang, pay attention!
Wang: I was distracted by that giant flying–
Musician: Willie.
Willie Nelson: Yeah?
Musician: What’s that?
Willie Nelson: [squints] Well, that looks like a giant–
Colonel: Johnson?!
Johnson: Yes, sir?
Colonel: Get on the horn to British Intelligence and let them know about this.
Later, as Dr. Evil is escaping:
I find this hole story is really hard to swallow.
I think this company should reconsider such a rigid policy.
There should be a policy on how many bad puns are allowed in a post
LOL…..
Aren’t most readers herein frequent flyer members?
Another airline to add to my no fly list move over Spirit and Frontier.
I didn’t realize you were a master debater
Mr. Leff – You stated in another post that you wanted to clean up the comments section…
But may I humbly ask – why do you keep posting these provocative stories, knowing very well what type of comments will ensue?
Personally, I enjoy the wide range of opinions in the comments section, but I just want to know what your motivation is posting these junk stories… Thank you.
Sounds like a cockamamie story. But perhaps they were trying to speak like seamen.