Department of Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy appears in a video with an etiquette coach (who has a book coming out) to promote ‘rules of the air’.
This is basically his “civility campaign” dressed up in what non-natives think is trending internet language (“red flags / green flags / beige flags”). It’s Duffy’s “Golden Age of Travel Starts with You” effort, which misses the point about the role of the department and what actually drives behavior.
I’m sympathetic to a desire for people to dress better and act better, but that’s a personal preference bounded by:
- The small-d democratization of air travel, by which people from all walks of life and backgrounds come together inside a small metal tube.
- The stresses of air travel, often imposed by the government itself from TSA lines, barking and frisking to delays caused by government-provided air traffic control.
- Failures of airlines to provide a clean, comfortable product – where they’re shielded by government-provided immunity from liability to deliver on promises (Airline Deregulation Act preemption of common law tort claims).
People start where they are, have access to the air, but the air is uniquely unpleasant as a largely government-controlled monopoly that protects incumbent carriers and limits variability in business models.
Here’s Duffy and his etiquette coach:
I want everyone to bring their best during the holiday travel season!
An etiquette coach shares the red flags, green flags, and beige flags for people as they go to the airport like:
Taking off your shoes
✅ Helping a neighbor at baggage claim
⚠️ Reclining your seatWatch… pic.twitter.com/48ahhzTirs
— Secretary Sean Duffy (@SecDuffy) December 22, 2025
The core message: holiday travel is stressful so passengers should stop being annoying. DOT isn’t going to enforce rules against airlines, and under federal law and Supreme Court precedent they’re your only avenue of redress, so you’re on your own. Here are their specifics (some of which are quite correct).
Don’ts (their “red flags”)
- Don’t clog the boarding flow: don’t plant yourself in the aisle to rearrange your stuff while everyone’s trying to get to their row.
- Don’t bring foods that punish the whole cabin: avoid strongly smelly items, messy foods, or anything loud/crunchy/obnoxious.
- Don’t go barefoot in shared spaces: this is basic hygiene and for other people’s comfort.
- Don’t play audio out loud: if you’re watching/listening to something, use headphones.
- Don’t take calls on speaker (or be that loud caller): keep conversations quiet and private; don’t turn the cabin into your conference room.
Oh, wait.
DISGUSTING!! What sort of person walks BAREFOOT down a plane aisle — in first class, no less. Even worse, it was on his way to the toilet!
RFK Jr is a really strange dude. pic.twitter.com/tQXdYUtGfz
— Jon Cooper (@joncoopertweets) November 13, 2023
Do’s (their “green flags”)
- Offer practical help when it’s genuinely helpful: assist someone struggling with a heavy bag getting it into the overhead bin, lend a hand at baggage claim if someone’s having trouble managing luggage.
- Give parents a break: a small supportive comment or a bit of patience for a solo parent with little kids counts as “good citizenship.”
- Act like a decent representative of the country: if someone’s visiting and unfamiliar with the U.S., be extra civil and welcoming.
“It depends” (their “beige flags” / gray areas)
- Seat switching: It’s acceptable to ask, but only if you’re prepared to take “no” immediately and gracefully. If you do ask, don’t propose a downgrade; try to propose something roughly equivalent.
- Reclining: Don’t reflexively slam your seat back. Check what the person behind you is doing. If it’s meal/service time or they’re working, treat reclining as inappropriate. If it’s an overnight situation and the row is already in sleep mode, reclining is more defensible.
- Armrests: the middle seat gets both shared armrests.
The key for me is in the introduction to the video. Duffy opens by gesturing at air traffic control modernization as the huge need in aviation, and it’s the number one responsibilty under him. But he immediately pivots to passenger manners. It’s an unintentional parody of misplaced focus: “yes, I’m on the big safety infrastructure thing. Anyway, reclining.” And passenger etiquette is just not the binding constraint on safety or system performance.
Meanwhile, it’s hard for this administration to sell “be polite and show class.” Maybe Duffy could pitch it to his boss first? Just to name a few:
- Trump calling a reporter “piggy” on Air Force One (and the White House defending it).
- “Grab them by the p*ssy.”
- Referring to then-Senator John McCain “I like people who weren’t captured.”
- Mocking disabled reporter Serge Kovaleski during a rally
- Referring to Megyn Kelly, “blood coming out of her… wherever.”
- Calling Sen. Elizabeth Warren “Pocahontas” including at an event honoring Native American World War II veterans
The etiquette red flags are correct, just a bit ‘Bill Clinton promoting school uniforms’ kind of stuff, small ball and inappropriate as the role for the federal government.
I’d push back a bit on helping with bags. Ask first and be careful. You don’t know what you’re lifting. People can misunderstand the help and escalate conflict (“don’t touch my bag”).
In any case “etiquette causes inflight conflict” doesn’t quite work empirically. Conflict incidents spiked due to mask mandates in 2021. They stayed elevated because of (1) much greater tendency to report and track incidents following the huge spike, and (2) much lower percentage of frequent travelers who ‘know the drill’ and tend to be more culturally homogenous.
The focus on dress, too, reads like old man yelling at clouds, insisting everyone conform to the norms of the laptop class in order to ‘belong’. And the only ways that attire really matters reducing conflict is (1) if we ban MAGA hats and politics generally from the cbain, and (2) more demure attire so wives and girlfriends don’t get angry at their partners for gawking.
Is there any indication that the ‘Golden Age of Travel’ campaign has affected actual passenger behavior at all?
What’s this administration’s obsession with gold? Etiquette lessons from these oafs is hilarious. This guy’s daughter wants to ban TSA just as the Congress woman from the Carolinas wants to be treated like a passenger on a private jet on a commercial flight in a public airport. Just as cutting your toe nails in first class is disgusting (I’ve seen it) these etiquette tips are banal.
I agree with him
Sorry I find kindergarten for travelers an unnecessary insult. Let Duffy tell us what and where we can expect his improvements. Then we will talk about the golden age of travel
I agree with him. Our society has devolved into adults with the maturity level of a five year old. What I see at airports and lounges and on airplanes is astounding. People with unlaundered clothing and unwashed bodies. Loud. Complete inability to board a plane and find seat 27B.
At least it enables YouTube content creators to have loads to upload featuring airport and airline meltdowns.
Politics is downstream of culture.
Until the culture improves, Duffy is spitting into the wind.
@Don G — You’re welcome to uphold whatever silly subjective standards of ettiequte you hold dear, but that is not necessary or helpful for the Secretary of Transportation or this administration to be focused on when they should be properly hiring, training, retaining, paying, and supporting their teams, including ATC that enables this entire industry to function. Instead, they ignore the essentials, use those workers like pawns, and fail us, the traveling public. We deserve better, including meaningful air passenger rights legislation like EU261 or Canada’s APPR which compensate us when the airlines fail us. Until then, this is all fluff, distraction, and farce.
“the middle seat gets both shared armrests.”
A misunderstanding. Since they are shared armrests they cannot be for the exclusive use a single passenger by definition.