‘Control Your Child Or I’ll Do It For You’ Man Threatens To Discipline Spitting Girl On Denver Flight

Shayla Monnier, an online influencer-nurse and influencer, went viral recounting a flight from Atlanta to Denver where a young girl on the plane repeatedly blew “raspberries” at her and her husband. Parents tried to control the child, but the girl continued spitting. Shayla’s husband warned the parents to manage the child – or he’d step in, “If you don’t get your kid under control, I’ll do it for you.”

Parents tried to stop the girl, but spit landed on the couple multiple times.

  • The girls parents were both masked. The husband told them they should mask their child, too!

  • The girl’s mother told him that he doesn’t understand, because he doesn’t have children. He replied that he… has five kids and six grandchildren.

  • Shayla suggests that special needs children need to be managed specially managed – and the parents were failing in this obligation.
@shaylamonnier What would you do? ✈️ #fyp #trending #airplane #travel #whatwouldyoudo ♬ original sound – Shay-la ⭐️

@shaylamonnier Replying to @ranger275wife ♬ original sound – Shay-la ⭐️

Passengers don’t deserve to be spit on. Responding in a threatening manner, that you’ll take over discipline of someone else’s child, can only escalate matters.

There are parents trying hard and doing their best, and parents who check out on a plane and let their kids run rampant. I think that’s the biggest delineator of culpability here, and it’s hard to know from this tale which one is the case.

However a parent still bears responsibility for the actions of their child, who is doing harm to others here. Whether there’s something they could do in the moment, whether the behavior was foreseeable and should have been prevented – or this was a child who shouldn’t have been taken on the flight in the first place – is difficult to know. Regardless, the child’s parents have a duty to apologize, and if there’s any reasonable make good possible to deliver on that.

Eventually, a flight attendant intervened and instructed the parents to mask child. The couple received flight credits for the inconvenience, and the child fell asleep for the rest of the journey. It’s the parents of the child who should have funded the flight credits, though, not the airline. But the victims here should have left it up to the flight attendant to address, rather than being so confrontational. Do you agree?

About Gary Leff

Gary Leff is one of the foremost experts in the field of miles, points, and frequent business travel - a topic he has covered since 2002. Co-founder of frequent flyer community InsideFlyer.com, emcee of the Freddie Awards, and named one of the "World's Top Travel Experts" by Conde' Nast Traveler (2010-Present) Gary has been a guest on most major news media, profiled in several top print publications, and published broadly on the topic of consumer loyalty. More About Gary »

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Comments

  1. I stopped reading and giving any credibility/interest to this story after:
    “Shayla Monnier, an online influencer-nurse and influencer…..”

  2. Clearly the kid’s family should not have flown. If they cannot afford manners, they should not be allowed to afford the flight.

  3. Responding in a threatening manner, that you’ll take over discipline of someone else’s child, can only escalate matters.

    Anybody threatening my kid on a flight will be summarily knocked out like how Harvey socked it to Tanner in his face at that deposition over Coastal Motors.

  4. I have seen many parents disregarding or tolerating their children’s behavior that others find unacceptable . The little prince or little princess syndrome is very common.

    I have sympathy for special needs but special needs doesn’t mean the child can’t be told difference between right and wrong

  5. @Yin-Dao Yan It’s always the keyboard warriors who do very little, if anything, when confronted. My guess is you’re one of those guys.

  6. Let’s not think for a minute the FA would have done anything if it didn’t escalate

    Tell ANY flight attendant proactively you’re having an issue with a developmentally disabled child and they’ll lock themselves in the first class washroom rather that deal with that hot potato

  7. That’s not even a threat. It’s not like he threatened to hurt the child, he was saying he’ll get their child under control. It’s sad that any of you could possibly think he was in the wrong.

    Narcissistic entitled Millennials and gen z having babies…buckle up buckaroos.

  8. Kids should be hard drugged on aircraft. Like hand out pills and the sleep for hours. Put them in the overhead bin.

  9. I’m not sure if I would have spit on the little brat back, smacked it or smacked the parents. A basic lack of civility is missing here. No way should anyone have to put up with that. If I had done that when I was a kid I would have recieved a punishment lesson on the spot.

  10. Yin Dao Yan clearly does not understand the person that throws the first punch rarely is the innocent party. It shows a huge lack of self control, but more importantly, that parental attitude of entitlement is the likely source of intolerable behavior by a child – that is it is a “learned” behavior!

    I had a similar experience with the child in the seat behind me kicking my seat relentlessly. I tried being reasonable with both the parents and the child, but to no avail; then I sternly informed them that if they did it again I was going to break both of the legs of the little monster. That message achieved the desired result. It was probably an idle threat, after the first leg was broken, they would have likely gotten control of the brat.

  11. It sounds like the man did what was necessary to get the situation under control. The child’s parents were horrible. This action was most likely not by a lap child but rather by one with their own seat. Putting the seatbelt on the child fairly tightly is the responsible thing to do and holding a hand around the seatbelt mechanism to keep it from being released would probably solve the problem.

  12. Demand the flight divert to the nearest station for that carrier, remove the masked/spitting family, and sue them for diversion cost. And have every passenger on that flight join the suit as a class for cost recovery of lost time + damages. Hand the parents a 7-figure judgement and publicize the hell out of it. This will put an end to children who should not be on planes.

  13. Buck to FA with explanation of repeated ill behavior and health risk of child repeatedly spitting. (And no parental response.). Up to FA’s and crew. If no response from FAs then ask for reseating or speaking to captain.

  14. The child was in the seat in front of them. Which means most likely she was standing up to turn around and spit on them

    Don’t give me any crap about the parents not making her SIT properly in her seat. Special needs doesn’t give her license, or her parents, to do what she wants.

  15. When I was a kid my mother always gave us the “talk” about what would happen if we acted the fool while out in public. Yes I got disciplined a few times for not obeying her instructions to behave myself and cut it out. Of course this was back in the day when parents could actually discipline their kids.

  16. Not having been there I can’t address what sounds like a really lousy situation. It is accurate though that people who don’t kids (not the case here) don’t always realize what’s involved in managing even non-special needs but high energy ones. My first son was a real handful as a 3 year old, so I got a harness and leash arrangement–then in the mall he’d get on all fours and crawl along barking. People who had kids would ask where they could buy that, those who didn’t would yell at me. (Now he’s a judge, so go figure.)

    One sort of funny story though. My cousin made the mistake of taking his 2 year old on a non-stop flight from New York to Sydney. Again, I wasn’t there but he said the boy eventually became wild, running up and down the aisle yelling. The FA came over and politely and quietly said, “If you don’t control that f*** kid I’m going to throw him out the window.” Lesson learned. (They stopped in Hawaii on the way back.)

  17. @Yin-Dao Yan: Your kids continues to spit on me and you do nothing about it?

    You are going to need plastic surgery after the flight to fix your re-arranged face.

    Being spit upon is one of the most demeaning things that can happen to a person.

    Control your vermin.

  18. Wow… after reading some of these comments, I’m surprised y’all aren’t suggesting summary execution of all involved or maybe a surface ro air missile to take out the whole plane, since no one has the right to do anything.
    Y’all are a bit out there today.

  19. The excuses parents trot out these days for not disciplining their kids are astounding. And noone else , including the victim of their incompetence , can say a thing. After all they did such a unique job bringing a kid into this world

  20. It is quite astounding to me that most U.S. parents today do not use “No” to discipline a child. They will try to reason with the child, which is impossible when children are young. Or they will wheedle or bribe the child, which reinforces the behavior by giving the child what he/she wants — attention and the thing for which the child is acting out. I have yet to figure this out.

    Maybe the parents think the child’s behavior is cute (it isn’t) or funny (it isn’t). Think about the usual response from teenagers to bad behavior — “We were just joking.” (No, you weren’t. And ask yourself if the victim thinks it is funny or a joke.)

    The one or two times I have had to object to a small child’s behavior in a public place, a simple and sharp “No” often stops the behavior. Maybe it is so rare for a child to hear “No” that they stop what they are doing and look at me. A calm “Thank you” is usually what I follow with.

    As for the keyboard warriors threatening physical violence in this column — GROW UP.

  21. Face the facts keyboard warriors. Ain’t nothing you can do to the kid. Lay a Finger on anyone elses kid and sorry but no one gonna take your side in any court of law. You’ll quite possibly also go to jail. This lady seems like an attention whore anyways. You have a few options here 1) ask the kid and parents politely to stop 2) ignore it or 3) move and get flight attendant involved.

  22. Completely disagree with your conclusion. Parents need to control their kids. If they don’t others will. I am tired of being abused and mistreated and then told I need to be tolerant and accepting of others’ crap.

  23. Not everyone likes your children!

    I would have offered to step in and slap the child.

  24. Spitting is a biohazard. The plane should be diverted and the child arrested, parents fined.

    Kicking the seat? No diversion.

  25. @yinyan control yours and you wouldn’t have to worry about being in that situation. Don’t act like it’s okay and you’d handle it because just like these negligent parents they can’t even handle it at home.

  26. Why didn’t the parents just claim the kid was a service animal and such behavior must be tolerated?

  27. WHY is it always on USA flights… does no one know how to behave?

    This story reminds me of a famous Paul Lynde anecdote…

    Paul Lynde was flying in first Class, where an annoying child was running up and down the aisle.
    No one did anything for ages and the parents refused to discipline their choild.
    Finally, a slightly inebriated Paul Lynde shouted, “hey lady! get your kid to sit down or I’m gonna f^ck her!”

    Situation resolved instantly.

  28. Two words – “Gentle Parenting”. It’s all the rage, and the source of so many badly behaved children. It also leads to mentally unstable teens and young adults. I see it in my own family – behavior SO and I would never have tolerated in our own children is tolerated in nieces and nephews. I had a teacher tell me the other day that her class of 3rd graders was the worst in 20 years of teaching. Maybe that’s Covid or maybe that’s parents who never tell their kids “no”. The rest of us don’t have to tolerate your bad decisions and should make it known.

    Any parent who refuses to control their kid or defends their bad behavior on a plane is going to find themselves answering to the flight crew. And you’re going to lose.

    As for Paul Lynde, he had no interest in any female. But change that story to Leonardo DiCaprio, and I’d believe it.

  29. Put a plastic bag over the kid’s head. Zip-tie their hands. Seat Belt buckled. Problem solved.

  30. Hey Parents! If your child is unable, or unwilling, to behave properly on a plane, DO NOT FLY. We, the flying public have NO INTEREST in dealing with your undisciplined brats spitting, kicking seats, screaming, throwing things, hitting people, etc. We are SICK OF IT and also sick of parents that suck at being parents.
    You may need to go Greyhound or just stay home until your child can behave properly.
    NO ONE wants to be trapped in a metal tube with you and your problem child.

  31. Spare the rod, spoil the child.

    Some children need to be spanked or otherwise receive corporal punishment. This is one of them.

  32. I am trying to picture this…you have a couple, presumably sitting together…in a row with 3 seats? Then you have parents and a kid, presumably not a lap child, taking another 3 seats? So where is the aisle? Or were they in the seats in front the the child spitting into their face? In any case was there anyone else in the couple ‘s row? I think I woukd have gotten up and removed myself or if the kid was spitting from in front of me, found or asked for something to block. But all in all, I am not sure how these 5 people were seated….

  33. Common Sense 101:
    Parents who don’t train their children while their children are young are setting those children up for a life of problems with the law and society in general. It’s another form of child abuse…

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