Man Abandons New Wife At Start Of Their Honeymoon When He’s Offered Business Class Upgrade

A 33 year old recently-married woman shares what happened when she and her new husband started off on their honeymoon, and only one of them was offered an upgrade for their flight.

She’s a frequent business traveler with a lot of miles, and had requested confirmed upgrades for the two of them on their flight to Mexico. Her husband is the opposite, he’s not a regular flyer at all. He’s afraid of flying and “tends to just hold [her] hand and close his eyes during take off and landing (mostly okay when in the air).” He’d never flown up front before.

Unfortunately their upgrades didn’t clear in advance, but they were waitlisted for a free upgrade at the gate. They were listed together based on her status, and they received the last upgrade seat – just one. They didn’t realize it until they went to board, and one of the coach boarding passes scanned back with an error.

  • She tells the gate agent no thank you, they’ll take their coach seats and stay together. It’s their honeymoon!

  • But he chimes in, “No it’s fine, I’ll go to business class!” He tells his new wife that she gets to fly all the time, and has been up front before. He “deserves a chance to experience it.”

Feeling awkward standing there as everyone else waits behind them to board, she agrees and gets on but she is “pissed off.” She’s stewing, while he texts her for comfort over his fear of flying – indeed, now his fear of flying on his own without her.

He is all smiles, taking his seat and I go back to my seat where they sit me next to an old woman with a baby on her lap where my husband should be sitting.

Within maybe 5-10 minutes of sitting there, trying to hold back tears because my husband left me alone on our flight during our honeymoon (and uses MY points for his upgrade no less), he starts to text me saying he feels anxiety over flying. I ignore the texts and stop looking at my phone.

An hour into the flight the recent groom returns to coach and offers her “half of his business class breakfast” and demands to know why she wasn’t texting back to comfort him?

She tells him maybe he should’ve thought about his fears before leaving her alone at the start of their honeymoon trip? Now he’s furious – the only time he’s ever flown in a premium airline cabin, and he’s even giving up half his breakfast rather than getting all of it for himself! And while she was willing to move on, he kept “guilt tripp[ing her] about not comforting him via text before take off.”

Normally my position with upgrades is that when an airline offers one, you take it. Coach is bad. You should not wish it on someone that you love. And it’s ok to be apart for a few hours. The one exception? A honeymoon.

  1. This was just a flight not Mexico, not long haul, coach isn’t that bad
  2. If there’s one time you’re supposed to want to be squeezed in next to your someone, it’s the start of your honeymoon?
  3. She’s a frequent flyer enough to sponsor upgrades, they’re still young, why would it be his only chance to be up front?
  4. And at the same time, it is his only chance to start his honeymoon together with his wife – unless, of course, he keeps pulling stuff like this in which case he may wind up with the chance to have another one.

Now, to be clear, we don’t know that this was just a domestic first class seat either. Airlines often send widebodies to Cancun, Mexico when they have a few hours of aircraft time on the ground between Europe trips, for instance. So the fight may have been over a flat bed and not merely over a bigger seat and disappointing meal.

Last summer – after I’d lost my ConciergeKey status – I was able to confirm domestic upgrades for my wife and daughter. I booked myself an exit row aisle and rolled the dice on an upgrade. It didn’t come through on the outbound (but wound up with an empty middle next to me), and it did clear for our return.

Of course it was a different matter on our honeymoon. For our final flight segment my seat next her got taken by an air marshal. Most of the cabin was taken up by former Congresswoman Jennifer Dunn and her entourage. We were still together in first, but it took quite some finagling to actually get to end our honeymoon beside each other. Because come on.

At the start of our honeymoon trip we watched couples bickering before boarding Air Tahiti Nui from Los Angeles to Papeete. Some people shouldn’t be getting married in the first place, and they probably shouldn’t have been seated together in business class (fortunately we didn’t have to watch the bickering continue, back then Air Tahiti Nui had first class). But assuming that you want to spend your honeymoon together then you’d… spend your honeymoon together.

About Gary Leff

Gary Leff is one of the foremost experts in the field of miles, points, and frequent business travel - a topic he has covered since 2002. Co-founder of frequent flyer community, emcee of the Freddie Awards, and named one of the "World's Top Travel Experts" by Conde' Nast Traveler (2010-Present) Gary has been a guest on most major news media, profiled in several top print publications, and published broadly on the topic of consumer loyalty. More About Gary »

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  1. Been married 27 years. Recently had an opportunity to upgrade from sfo to Cleveland but there was only 1 seat in first. I gave it up to sit with my wife. There’s no way I would enjoy my seat alone knowing she’s in coach.

  2. Both of them spoiled babies.

    First, trip not that damn long.

    Second,they’ve got the rest of their lives to be jammed up next to each other, being apart a few hours isn’t the crisis some make it.

    Third, she should have welcomed giving him a new experience instead of being a whiny baby because he wasn’t surgically attached to her side

    Fourth, they deserve each other.

  3. That is a funny story.

    However the forthcoming divorce will not be so.

    Husband needs to grow a few.

  4. What an entitled moron. If I were her, the only person I’d be texting is a divorce lawyer. Why stay with someone that lacks character or values?

  5. My partner and I would have just quickly played paper/rock/scissors and whoever won got the seat. No big deal. We still love each other just as much.

  6. As a man of the same age as this woman, I can say this. It’s very hard for men to find a woman they actually love. There is huge social pressure to get married. What happens to 80% of men is they settle for a merely not repulsive woman. The benefits of marriage are social cohesion (both for their own family/friend group as well as for society at large), saving money on taxes, and having a default buddy for hobbies or activities like travel or trying out a new restaurant. Love, beauty, and romance are out of the equation in these marriages.

    If you can’t imagine leaving your wife in coach on your honeymoon then you probably love your wife, but you’re in the minority.

  7. Wow. A honeymoon with no sex. He may get the warm nuts sitting up front on the flight to Mexico, but his own nuts are going to be cold for the rest of the trip.

  8. so much babble.. who in the world is congresswoman Jenifer Dunn?
    so tired
    btw, the man on honeymoon was (is) a JERK

  9. “What happens to 80% of men is they settle for a merely not repulsive woman.”

    Wouldn’t that also apply to women? I don’t see a huge number of excellent choices in the husband sweepstakes.

  10. Showing a woman her place while having the sensitivity to be open about his fear of flying?

    What a maverick!

  11. I have always found that if you are nice to people they in turn are nice to you instead of being demanding, which gets you no place. When my Mom died and 3 of us had to fly from Florida to Neark (Mom was in the cargo hold) I mentioned to the aent that we
    were flying “home” to put Mom into the ground. She arranged for all of us to be seated TOGETHER instead of scattered through the plane. End of story. Whether or not the above mentioned marriage will last or the personalities becomes a moot point. Everyone today is a critic and people don’t seem to care about being nice and simply asking for help in a nice and sincere way! Don’t kill the messanger 🙂

  12. A happy wife is a happy life. He could have shown his wife how much he thought of her and instead his self centered personality came through. He could have even taken the business class seat and then gave it to the person seated next to her in coach. Almost anyone seated next to his wife would have taken that deal. In that case he would have came off as generous (even though it was by using her upgrade miles) and wanting to sit next to his wife.

  13. I look forward to seeing you in Mexico. :: gulps down cocktails::

    I’m not married yet, but I’m committed to relationships, and I sit where I want on a plane without sulking.

  14. There is clearly a breakdown in communication.

    The wife should be supportive of her husband experiencing first class for the first time. The husband should be supportive of his wife getting the best. After a round of “you take it”, “no, you take it”, the husband should experience it for the first time.

    They should be going to someplace other than Mexico for a honeymoon. When they were on the wait list, the topic of one person getting the upgrade was very plausible.

  15. “He could have even taken the business class seat and then gave it to the person seated next to her in coach. Almost anyone seated next to his wife would have taken that deal. In that case he would have came off as generous (even though it was by using her upgrade miles) and wanting to sit next to his wife.”

    That’s the real genuine man move. You want to sit next to your wife. You give a stranger a random upgrade. You look good to everyone. Everyone is happy.

  16. This story came from a Reddit subreddit where many of the stories are suspected to be fictional. This wasn’t even much of an ethical dilemma as the subreddit is supposed to deal with — clearly the husband chose poorly.

    Even if this really happened, it’s still just a Reddit post. I read that subreddit for entertainment, but here on View from the Wing, I’m looking for information or at least things that Gary knows to be true.

  17. “Your really put your mouth in your foot this time.”

    Mouth in your foot? Could you possibly be any more ignorant? You continue to prove why AI will be a failure.

  18. Looks like he has never learned the “happy wife, happy life” phrase….but maybe someday when he gets remarried he will have finally figured it out!

  19. We had six people on 2+ hour flight in coach. Called my name for upgrade at gate. When I found out it was only one seat, I passed.

  20. @James N
    I turned it around just for you, Sorry you’re too stupid to figure it out, and if you don’t like it you can stick it. I’m sure you can figure that one out!

  21. No way would I sit away from my honey but I did give him the last seat upfront coming back from Rome. He definitely earned it. Over all a dull and long story.

  22. If the story is true, the husband should have absolutely sat next to his wife. It’s the gentleman thing to do, especially since she preemptively turned down the upgrade to sit next to her partner, but can we please get away from this happy wife, happy life nonsense? Mutual sacrifice, folks. I love and respect my wife, but ain’t nobody walking all over me to get what she wants all the time.

  23. I say this is a fabricated story.
    In a follow-up comment, the poster wrote: “I have status that allows me to do use 500 points to upgrade.”
    There is no program that do these upgrades.

  24. “I turned it around just for you…”

    Yep, that’s the usual excuse when someone says/writes something stupid. An area in which you’re very familiar. It just kills you to know I was right about everything I’ve been been saying for the past four years, and you’re to ignorant to figure it out.

  25. This man is absolutely a keeper. If he’s that impressed by business class he developed blinders and became willfully and unapologetically ignorant to his new wife , imagine how easy it will be to placate him later in life. Like “here honey for our anniversary I bought this coupon that gives us 15% off at Outback if you eat between 8 and 830am and order at least a dozen catfish,” or like, a hand-drawn coupon good for a free back rub. Buy him a Dodge Neon and youll practically guarantee his eternal devotion.

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