American Airlines has updated its Contract of Carriage, the adhesion contract you agree to when buying a ticket, to detail new reasons you might be banned from flying the airline based on your behavior.
One of these new reasons is downright metaphysical.
You can now be banned from flying American Airlines if you “show the potential to be while on board” (emphasis mine).
Whether phrased as Cogito, ergo sum (Latin) or “Je pense, donc je suis” (French) you might think therefore you are. This thinking, then, is the sine qua non of your being. Sensient humans are at risk of banning by the airline.
Or, you know, maybe eliminating 30% of management staff took with it some of the better contract lawyers in Skyview.
To be sure I may make typos in blog posts. This site is only me, no staff, period – and it isn’t so easy for me to ban you from the internet for being…