Picking up someone from the airport is an act of love. It takes effort and planning. It’s twice as much driving, and it involves waiting. You may want to signal how much you care early on in a relationship, but after the need to impress wears off most of the time the answer is just Uber or Lyft.
Choosing between Uber and Lyft usually means pulling up both, comparing price and wait times and considering that there are usually richer rewards with Lyft. I earn 10x Chase points plus a Bilt point and ThanksAgain points on my Lyft rides, but find usually rides take a little longer to confirm. Wait times vary by city.
Uber and Lyft say that their premium services (‘Black’) are special, but they aren’t. It used to be ‘professional drivers’ and there was a real difference in vehicles and service. I’ve found no discernable difference in service, and a defining-down of vehicle quality differences as well.
So what if you really want to make a statement with your airport pickup? There’s the ‘Uber for a security detail with motorcade’ that appears to have launched in New York and Los Angeles. Prices start at $200 an hour for a single vehicle and ‘protector’.
Over the last few months, I’ve been advising @bookprotectors: a new app for ordering an on-demand security detail. Or more simply: Uber with guns.
Today, they’re debuting in Los Angeles and NYC at No. 3 on the App Store.
If you have a hot date this weekend, pick her up in a… pic.twitter.com/zVCH7BkctQ
— Nikita Bier (@nikitabier) February 18, 2025
Here’s an actual on-demand bodyguard airport pickup:
@fuzzandfuzz uber could neverrrr #nyc #bodyguard #nycgirl #airportlife #uber ♬ Just A Girl – No Doubt
Meet your driver:
John is a Protector pic.twitter.com/3TqEXOjfsU
— Protector (@bookprotectors) February 18, 2025
If you actually need this you’re either a celebrity, a billionaire with public persona, or just wanting to signal importance and craft that narrative for yourself. It makes sense to hire a security detail, perhaps, in Fallujah or Kandahar I guess, though it also makes you stand out and will your team actually risk their lives for you or just highlight that you’re worth ransoming?
As a business, I have to wonder the extent to which this scales. There are probably enough retired ex-cops, and not enough former Navy SEALs. Most aren’t going to need to hire real mercenaries, though. The app sells that you can even pick the attire of the team you’re hiring, in addition to how many vehicles will travel in your convoy.
This probably works best in L.A. for the signaling, New York for the critical mass of people that can afford it, and Miami because Miami. I wonder how they’ll handle users in Miami using these teams are part of the drug trade. The Miami airport pickup, though, would be a real flex.
This will pair nicely with my American Express Centurion Black card
Now everyone will know who I am
Best to be unknown and of unremarkable appearance.
@ Jack — Indeed
But there are types who want more drama or at least the appearance of it so that the video of their pickup will nicely with their profile/persona on TikTok/Insta/Snap/X/Threads/BlueSky/Mastodon/Reddit/Quota/OF/JFF/whatever. For just $100 more than a plain old Uber Black why not?
When I used to be provided government security escorts in some rather volatile parts of Asia, I felt far more exposed to becoming a target for hostile militants than being in a nondescript vehicle without any obvious security escort visible. And worse yet if there was a military convoy on the roads.
Hiring one of these security escorts to go from MIA, JFK or LAX to a hotel? Stupid “security” is “security” for show and then noted as being without it. But this is mostly not going to be security because of a need for security unless the customers are doing shady business.
Maybe this can be NYC Mayor Eric Adam’s’ next gig, as that crook shouldn’t be mayor. Or maybe he can be Turkish Airlines’ celebrity spokeshole.
@Jack — This guy gets it.
If you have actual wealth, and aren’t a narcissist, you don’t seek attention—you play it down, blend in, and live comfortably. Best of both worlds because it’s less stress, you are no real target, and you often can afford to sit ‘up front’ on your own dime.
This ‘service’ is either for the mercenaries of the oligarchs who have to pay for their own security after, say, gutting the social safety net for the rest of us—I’m thinking this is perfect for the ‘DOGE’ tech bros, if they don’t already get driven around in government vehicles for their personal trips (how ‘efficient!’). It’s perfect for that so-called ‘big balls’ guy. I mean, if you screw over tons of people on a whim as your ‘job,’ then you had better pay for protection and also please do ‘live in fear.’
Or, it’s for the idiot ‘influencers’ who are trying to seem important while filming the whole thing on their smartphone. Then, they go through standard security because they can’t afford TSA PreCheck (and can’t film there), skip the lounge (because again, that’s pricey), and naturally, board in the last group and sit way in back (because again, for most, ‘influencer’ isn’t really a ‘job’) as they fly home to a ‘basic’ city like Pittsburgh (sorry Steelers fans).
@askmrlee, you might want to reset your expectations. *Each* guard runs $200 per hour. Most per-hour services require 3-hour minimum. Add that to a typical Escalade limo run of $250-300. My sense is your starting price approaches $1k. If one has a retinue of four, you are probably looking at nearly $3k for one hour.
Someone who needs the service doesn’t even think about the price. It’s just another expense for the accountants to pay.
But, to what end? Fame is a plague to be avoided. I know individuals who are so plagued.
The guy who desires external validation of worth asks “do you know who I am?” and misses the point. And, if one must ask the question . . . the person has no internal validation of worth.
There is a freedom to be able to walk down the street as just another face in the crowd.
Correction: $3k for the 3-hour minimum.
Standby for the next amazing AMEX Platinum Card offer.
Introducing a $104 annual credit for this service.
Terms and conditions:
1. Max credit of $2 per week.
2. Must order a XL vehicle.
3. Guards must be carrying a Sig P229.