Wife Refuses To Go On Vacation When Husband Books Himself In First Class, Her In Coach

A woman took to the internet to gauge whether she was overreacting. Her husband often travels alone with his best friend, but this time invited her along. He bought her a ticket in coach, while he buying tickets in first for himself and his friend. The man explained that she flies coach because the woman – a stay at home mom – has “no job” even though she reports they’re easily able to afford first class.

They left the kids with the wife’s mother, and got ready to travel, which is when she learned she’d be in economy and he wouldn’t. He “refused to discuss” it and then lambasted her, complaining that he “PAID FOR [HE]R TICKET..ISN’T THAT ENOUGH???” and belittling her for acting like “royalty.”

She cried, decided not to go on the trip, and picked the kids back up from her mother’s home. He took the trip. She asks whether she’s in the wrong “for not settling for economy?”

I’d add two points,

  • The internet sided with her, naturally. I’m almost skeptical of the story because it’s almost too egregious to be real.

  • She buys the usual explanation he offers for vacationing without her that he and his friend ‘like to attend sporting events.’ “Sporting events,” of course, means bordellos.

No one should wish coach on their partner. That goes for the one buying the lower class of service for a spouse, but also for the spouse who should never resent seeing their paramour up front. If you realize you resent your partner escaping economy, that’s a sign you don’t actually love that person. By the same token, if you can secure a premium cabin for the one you love and choose not to, do you actually love them?

Several years ago I wrote about husbands who fly business class while their wives fly coach. The Washington Post‘s relationship columnist has covered the issue, telling a woman whose boyfriend flies up front while he pays for her to fly coach that she should dump him: “His wife sat alone in coach: His epitaph writes itself.”

That said, spouses do not always need to sit together. Here’s a basic rule when only one seat up front is possible. When upgrades are offered, you take them. And if only one upgrade is available, it goes to the person that was upgraded.

(HT: Your Mileage May Vary)

About Gary Leff

Gary Leff is one of the foremost experts in the field of miles, points, and frequent business travel - a topic he has covered since 2002. Co-founder of frequent flyer community InsideFlyer.com, emcee of the Freddie Awards, and named one of the "World's Top Travel Experts" by Conde' Nast Traveler (2010-Present) Gary has been a guest on most major news media, profiled in several top print publications, and published broadly on the topic of consumer loyalty. More About Gary »

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  1. The actual seating arrangements, whatever they may have been, are not NEARLY as relevant as the attitude and the comments, all of which show a massive disrespect to the wife. The flight(s) and the vacation will soon be nothing but a memory; the disrespect will likely be permanent, if she chooses to remain in this relationship. Too bad he will be passing on this toxic attitude to his kid(s).

  2. When wife is along she flies Biz or First. She is the one who keeps the home front running when I’m jetting off and that is the least I can do.

    Once she was in First in my upgraded seat while I chugged off to coach in her seat. A few minutes later the guy setting next to her came back to me and offered to swap seats with me.

    There are still nice people out there.

  3. WOW, WHOA, and WOE!
    This guy’s photo should be in all dictionaries next to jerk.
    His wife should take the children and bid him adeui.
    After 50 years of marriage, my wife tries to get me to sit up front, but if it’s not both of us, it’s neither of us, as she won’t sit up front alone.
    And sporting events out of country while she is home with the children.
    Really, who goes for that—not many.
    Taker or giver in a relationship. One can be the lowest giver but keeps trying. If one is a taker, that one tries to keep upping their taker score.
    Just IMHO.

  4. I don’t believe the story. A person who was that much of a jerk,s wouldn’t even bother taking her to begin with. It just doesn’t make sense.

  5. There is no way my husband would fly first class and me coach!!! Happy wife , happy life?!. The story is a bit far fetched but I can believe there are dumbass men who would think oh that’s not that serious! I’ve been married 40 years so I know what I’m talking about! Wife should start going on trips with her friends. Girls outing to Paris or Hawaii. I would!

  6. I would present him with a bill for cooking, cleaning, laundry, childcare, taxi service, and the many other jobs a stay at home mom does.

  7. It wasn’t that they weren’t flying together in the article he yelled at her and said you don’t have a job, and you should be f****** grateful for even being allowed to come on this vacation. That’s the part of the article that we need to focus on.. if they didn’t buy the tickets all at the same time, there would be availability and also price differences…

  8. @ William Alford
    You are right. It just doesn’t make sense. And as Judge Judy says, “If it doesn’t make sense, it is not true!”

  9. Divorce his ass. Go get a job because of course he is going to sporting events. You can not be that stupid. He is not being faithful. You need to be able to support the children and you. It wont be easy but, you can do it. Make him pay child support. Promise you it will be the last time he buys first class. Dont forget the alimony.too. what an asshole. He doesn’t love you. You are his maid, and childcare provider that’s it. No relationship is there. Kick his ass to the curb. God Bless.

  10. My best friend of 51 years who also happens to be my husband AND love of my life…. would never treat me as “”less than ” himself. He also doesn’t even have friends with whom he does anything with. Nothing comes before me in his life. Not would I allow anything to supercede HIM in mine. We made a VOW, before God and meant it. So though we have 6 adult children and 23 grandchildren…HE is number one for me. Just as I am for this wonderful,kind,and loving man. We STILL spend hours in OUR bedroom,closed away from the world. Putting our relationship first? IS the only choice for a marriage that truly fits under the “ties that bind” design. We chose to live as one. And neither of us have cheated nor would even THINK of providing LESS to our spouse.

  11. It is too egregious to be real… Divorce this SOB, get half or more of your money, and fly first class on your own. He and his boyfriend will get over it.

  12. I always have my family fly in the same class as me, and that is often domestic F or international J. When I’ve gotten upgrades and the rest of the family has not (due to being status on the airline), I’ve offered it to my wife (who often does not take it), and when the kids were smaller would offer to swap my F seat to someone sitting next to them so I could be with them. Never had it turned down.

  13. Yeah no judgements but the real story is that his “best friend” is definitely more than that. Don’t knock on the door when he goes to his buddy’s hotel room for a few beers before dinner. 😐

  14. No, its not that complicated. the friend is not the boy friend. It’s just that his friend PAYS for his own seat, that’s all. The husband is too cheap and selfish to pay for others. His first class is probably from an upgrade anyways.

  15. Seriously ???? He apparently is controlling all aspects of her life, for whatever reason. Too many details missing in this story. Having said that, screw him….

  16. He is sleeping with the friend. Divorce him and don’t waste your time. Don’t depend on him and get yourself stable employment so he can pay for childcare, their medical insurance, dental, vision, alimony as well, and what ever else your lawyer can come up with while you work. He took away so many years. If he only knew how hard it is to be a home maker. If he was to pay for child care, a nanny, a chef there would be no way it would be enough for him and his boyfriend to go out of the country as much as he is going on first class.

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