Delta Flight Attendant’s Ultimate Tip For Asking Out A Member Of The Cabin Crew: Perfect Timing And Approach

A Delta Air Lines flight attendant shares some basic advice for the best way to ask out a member of the cabin crew on your flight: do it discretely and at the end of a flight, and I would add hopefully after you’ve made a connection of some kind over drink service, trash pickup or in the galley. (HT: Johnny Jet)

Do not hit on a flight attendant in flight, during a flight whatever, do not do that because you are making it awkward. And you know what? The flight attendant just has to be nice to you. So yeah, it’s just a really uncomfortable situation and we do not like that.

Okay, but if you wanna shoot your shot then your best bet is just handing your number to the flight attendant when you are getting off the plane. Then you’re not making it awkward and you’re leaving it up to the flight attendant to decide whether or not she wants to text you.

@wheelsupwithtyra if you see a cute flight attendant and want to start a conversation please don’t 🙂 here is some better advice… #flightattendant #pickupline #stewardess #airhostess #travel #aviation #airlinetiktok #adviceformen ♬ original sound – Tyra

Dating a flight attendant is really hard, and that’s once you’ve managed to create a connection.

  • Schedules are constantly changing, which means making plans is difficult.
  • Flight attendants most likely to be dating are junior enough never to get holidays off.
  • They’re away from home regularly, with colleagues, and this can promote jealousy in relationships.
  • Flight attendants also have among the highest divorce rates.

Yet there’s an attraction to dating flight attendants that dates back to the beginning of the profession. One man even called in a bomb threat trying to get a crewmember’s flight cancelled so she might consider a date with him.

Ultimately flight attendants are just like anyone else. They may be looking for love, or love might strike when they’re least looking. They are… at work. And asking out a flight attendant in front of 180 other passengers as well as their colleagues is awkward. Plus, there’s very little that’s sexy about most flights. A metal tube hurtling through the air at 500 miles per hour isn’t the ideal setting. Better if you happen to bump into them at the hotel bar!

Maybe don’t try to make your move while they’re serving drinks to the whole cabin, moving their galley cart down the aisle? And since you’re trying to create connection out of thin air, it’s almost like in-person online dating where the first rule is be attractive and the second rule is don’t be unattractive. Still, you might hit it off in conversation that goes on for awhile in the galley.

If you’ve made a connection – maybe you’re dressed just right, stood out by helping another passenger or offering food or layover advice – try to wait for the end of the flight and hand over a business card with a note, or write a short note with your number. Don’t do it midflight because that just makes everything awkward until you deplane. If it’s meant to be, hopefully they’ll send you a ‘nice to meet you’ text.

About Gary Leff

Gary Leff is one of the foremost experts in the field of miles, points, and frequent business travel - a topic he has covered since 2002. Co-founder of frequent flyer community InsideFlyer.com, emcee of the Freddie Awards, and named one of the "World's Top Travel Experts" by Conde' Nast Traveler (2010-Present) Gary has been a guest on most major news media, profiled in several top print publications, and published broadly on the topic of consumer loyalty. More About Gary »

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Comments

  1. No offense, but why in the world would someone want to hook up with a person they’ve never even met or spoken to (no, thank you for the meal is not speaking)???

    Because they are attractive? That’s what life is all about???

  2. She looks like an Only Fans wannabe. What’s with women having the porn star fake lips?

  3. Flight attendants as we know are poorly paid and low social status. Can you imagine that kind of person as your significant other?

    Pro tip. There is a significant number of unmarried women in top positions in finance and law firms in New York City. Pairing up with one of those women will yield both financial and social gains.

    You just have to understand that the nature of their jobs means their schedules leave very little time for dating and they will always have their work phone with them on-call so they can drop out of your date at a moment’s notice.

  4. @Moe, people meet a lot of different ways. I do not find it strange that someone would find an attractive flight attendant that moves and acts in the right manners to be a good candidate for a date if they are willing.

  5. Was this even necessary? Sorry but what’s next? how to date a Hooter’s Girl, or advice to pick up the sales team member at your local Nordstroms? Or leave a note for your nurse? These are hardworking professional, you are in their office space, so why not give them a break? Is there anything wrong with the advice of just pass a note? Probably not..and then one day, we will see FAs, at the aircraft exit door, with a little wicker basket for every potential suitor to drop his or her note into the basket. I get it that folks are looking to make a connection not based on an App, but what happens if your desired FA is working in the back of the aircraft while everyone is deplaning. Do you hang out until the cleaning crew comes?

  6. @jns

    I hear you…

    On the other hand, she’s being paid to act nice to everyone. In private she may be a witch.

  7. Did somebody smack her in the lips? Swollen?
    Somebody called them horse lips….Yikes? How, Why?

  8. Sound like back to the high level escort and prostitute label of flight attendant or stewardess6

  9. “but why in the world would someone want to hook up with a person they’ve never even met or spoken to”
    Do you really need this explained to you?

  10. I met a flight attendant when she got caught on the wrong side of the serving cart when the pilot had to use the lav. She was humming and I asked her what song she was singing. We chatted a bit and before the end of the flight I handed her my business card and told her the next time I was in DFW we could get together for a glass of wine if she would like. After that I went back to my book and left her to do her job. We’ve been married over 13 years now. She left the airline business less than 2 years after we were married. Dating was difficult with her schedule, and we lived in different cities, but we worked it out. If you want to make it work, it will work. Best AA flight I ever took. She is far from a sea hag or a low social status individual.

  11. First, look disinterested and browse on your phone all flight. This will endear her to you. Then when you walk out the plane, write your phone number on your leftover trash, and hurl it at her like she hurled your food onto your tray table. This will immediately make hero moist. Then roll your eyes, say “whatever”, and keep walking. You’re in.

  12. My Delta flight attendant dating days are over, so I can share: Find out where their quarters are during training in your hub city (for instance, for MSP it’s Burnsville MN) and then find them on the geo-based dating apps. They tend to come young, adventurous and lonely, but don’t expect longterm. Best case scenario: a companion pass.

  13. Slow news day? All these TikTok’ers and Insta “influencers” are oh so tiresome. People who proclaim to be “experts” or knowledgeable in their field when really they’re just voicing their own personal opinions – which half the time probably don’t match those of others in their industry and are just saying cr@p to get them followers. I suspect most FAs would rather not be hit on by their passengers, and doing so could probably get you in some messy situations if the timing was off and they took offence.

  14. And stay away from married flight attendants especially if you are a flight attendant yourself.

  15. I can’t even begin to imagine what a Klan gathering would be like and the vicious people that take part. If I were to guess, you could look right in this comment section and find many of those mean hearted people. These comments say absolutely nothing about flight attendants but everything I need to know about the people writing them. So very sad. I hope many of you can find joy in your life because it is so very short.

  16. Well, her advice is sound enough. But she is doing it in Delta uniform?!

    Well this moron have a job tomorrow?

  17. It’s fairly easy and I’ve barely tried. Twice at different times in life, single, I asked and was accepted. One Delta, (also a model) and one Aer Lingus. Both accepted. I’m not wealthy or handsome. These girls are there to travel and party…be interesting or be fun, just like with anyone else

  18. FA here! And this is so cringe. When did WE Delta FAs stoop so low?! Literally, out here having men degrade us (as they do normally) but with the uniform on and on social media giving “advice” on how to approach FA for a date?! Tyra, girl! This isn’t giving what you thought it would.

  19. I think you meant “discreetly”.

    Definition of “discreet”: Respectful of privacy or secrecy; exercising caution in order to avoid causing embarrassment; quiet; diplomatic.

    Definition of “discrete”: Separate; distinct; individual; non-continuous. quotations: ex. a government with three discrete divisions.

  20. The best advice I can give got asking out a flight attendant is: br really good looking.

  21. @ Magnifico. +1. How to ruin a perfectly good relationship with a FA . . . marry her.

  22. lol I just love how everyone is saying how hard it is to date an FA… as an airline pilot the lifestyle is what you make of it.

    If your comparison is “home every night” Then ya, not gonna happen. But, I’m home 16 days/month. Technically 21 when account for my trips either starting late in the day or ending early and considering that a day off.

    Most of the FA’s I know are good people with a tough job, whether or not YOU want to acknowledge it.

    Her suggestions are honestly quite good and I will agree with her that it is super awkward. You all forget to realize that 99% of the pax will ALWAYS look at what crew member is doing closest to them. Now imagine it’s a date.

    As for @Gary suggesting they’ll be at the hotel bar. HAHAHA. Crews don’t go there. We have a third party app with details on every layover hotel/city with discounts, restaurants etc… which is user updated. You would know that if you actually knew something about anything.

  23. I met a lovely flight attendant on TWA. Married her eight months later. Still married 45 years later.
    Back in those days TWA hired one out of 400 applicants. They had to have a college degree and meet standards.
    It’s sad that comments here demean air crews — I’ve found that they do their job and go home.

  24. I had another flight attendant hand a note to the one that I was interested in. It simply said, “where would you like to have dinner this weekend “.

    As we were landing, she came over and said” I’d love to have dinner”.and handed me her number.

    I was surprised but not as shocked as the guy sitting next to me , who laughed at me when I told him what I was going to do.

    30 years later. Her and I are still great friends after a great relationship.

  25. Have you seen a Delta flight attendant in the lately? Most of them can’t squeeze down the aisle and are usually nasty. If it were a flight attendant on an Asian Air carrier, now we’re talkin’

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