The Department of Transportation has been pressuring airlines to accommodate seat assignments for families free of charge. Previously groups of passengers that wanted to sit together might have to pay extra for seat assignments, or negotiate swaps at the gate. This effort has been largely successful.
However airline policies aren’t going to require other passengers with assigned seats to give up their seats so that families can sit together. If a family books onto a mostly full flight, there may not be available seats together. And when a flight gets cancelled, that new flight may not have seats together.
This usually gets sorted out, at the gate or on board the aircraft. Nobody actually wants to sit next to your children. Still, it’s best to get as good a seat as you can to offer up in trade. Don’t expect someone to give up their extra legroom aisle seat for your middle in the back of the aircraft, for instance.
- I was once asked to change seats so that a couple could sit together, only to learn that they were already seated together, they just didn’t like the bulkhead, and they stuck me with the bulkhead (I don’t like the bulkhead either!).
- A reader once gave up his premium seat so that a family could sit together only to have the family sell that seat to another passenger and not actually sit together.
One woman, though, is telling the world via an opinion piece in The Guardian that she’s sick and tired of being asked as a passenger to switch seats to accommodate families.
She’s also a flight attendant, so she’s also asked to accommodate the seat switchers, and she hates family travelers regardless of their seating needs, because they have other needs too (which presumably interrupt galley gossip or the latest issue of People or OK!).
Cabin crew have a term for these kinds of passengers – the Mary and Josephs; parents who act like they were the very first people on the planet to have children. You can often spot them loitering in the galley or carrying way too much luggage. They ask cabin crew to heat their baby bottles and food; they complain about the temperature.
The argument against switching seats is that the passenger has paid more for a better seat that they’re being asked to give up – and also that that passenger is always a woman so it’s sexist. But this simply doesn’t ring true:
The woman travelling alone is seated in the emergency exit row with extra legroom. Moving her to the seat behind would mean a less comfortable flight for her. Why should she have to give up her comfort for someone else’s children? I am fed up of solo passengers having to accommodate other travellers just because they have kids in tow.
The example of being pressured to give up an exit row seat makes no sense, because passengers are not asked to move from exit row seats in order to provide them to children:
- In the U.S. the specific age to sit in an exit row seat is 15.
- In Europe you must be an adult, and families traveling with children are expressly not permitted in exit rows.
The author references “a recent flight to Los Angeles,” where “one parent even told me to be quiet because their baby was sensitive to noise.” So let’s assume she’s talking about the United States. There is no reason to move to accommodate a family so that a 15 year old can sit with their parents. A 15 year old is allowed to travel on a plane in the U.S. by themselves, without being in unaccompanied minor status.
Moving seats to ensure families sit with children evokes images of parents separated from their five year olds, not their fifteen year olds. The Guardian should be fact checking their opinion pieces. When I’ve written op-eds for major newspapers there has been a rigorous fact check process.
You do not have to give up your seat. If you’re indifferent between seats that are on offer, it’s the nice thing to do. It’s even better when you’re offered a superior seat for your trouble. Consider offering $20 or at least buy the passenger that’s moving a drink on board as a thank you.
At the same time don’t resent someone for asking, of worry that someone might be getting something for free that you had to pay for. Too much of our politics is about giving things to specific groups when it benefits the giver politically. But that’s a problem of our politics, not the harried traveler who also wants their baby’s bottled warmed, and who needs to sit with their three year old to supervise them responsibly.
(HT: Michael C.)
I’m perfectly happy to switch seats for a couple or family, just so long as its at least an equivalent seat. I’m also perfectly happy to say no if it means switching a window or an aisle for a middle seat. I have experienced many families who have asked to switch seats but will only switch if THEY can keep their aisle or window, but wouldn’t find it important enough to sit together if it means they would have to give you their window or aisle seat and seat.
I have been seeing A LOT of requests lately. Given very infrequent flyers are reading garbage “travel hacks” on tiktok and thinking this is a legitimate way to get a better seat. (Ive seen the articles stating as such).
I have been averaging a request every trip (roundtrip) or about 50% of the time now. Its even in F class between companions. I am a window guy….most requests are never like for like….its always two aisle seats wanting to get a window…..i even had a couple insist on me moving when they are seated in the aisle seats directly across from each other (2C and 2D for example). I agree it should be like for like and no one should be upset for not moving….
The latest was on AA when i had the window booked for months (paid F class even) and there was upgraded passengers insisting on the request i move back so they can have two seats together in row 1. Ugh nope! When im upgraded to F class on AS – if i can get my window – awesome….but i do realize if aisle is all there is….im lucky to be there as i paid for Y class…..and i act like it!
My counter argument for families….you should be paying for seats….you chose to have families and to travel. Why should i subsidize you seat assignments when i have to pay for them?
My cousin recently flew with her 2yo and they were separate, in two middle seats, on United. Luckily, a nice young man switched with them, but that person had to give up a window/aisle seat to exchange for a middle seat in this case. The plane was full. She felt bad that he had to be stuck in the middle seat but in this case, what else could we have done?
I’m a dad with one older daughter. I’m a very frequent flyer as well… All the reasons in the article make sense to me, but they are, in my opinion, the exception. I’ve never asked anyone to switch a seat to something that is a lesser location. And, once my daughter was old enough, if seats together was not possible, one of us would go alone as long as someone was near our kid. What’s missing here is the fault of the airlines themselves. On United, I’m a million miler, have purchased tickets, and assigned the seats together, only to have _United split the family_ AFTER we’ve paid. This is beyond obnoxious. Now they are talking about how “families can book together” – sure, after United said this, they promptly changed our seating as they changed the equipment on our flight (over a month in advance, so not too surprising) and separated the family again. By the way – no messaging was provided for this change. I figured it out while reviewing the reservation. That’s an even worse practice on their part.
So, while many customers may be at fault, clearly, airlines are as well. With so many flights and people, there will always be examples like the ones described in this article, but what’s the average day-to-day situation? From my several million miles of flying, I’ve largely seen parents offering the same or better seat to switch, and many families that just put one parent next to a child, and one ends up somewhere else. I have seen one request over the years of someone asking to move from a better seat to a worse seat, and in that case, the person refused, and no one seemed to get too upset.
A few years back, I was flying WN on a confirmed ticket, and checked in early, specifically so I could board in A group and snag myself a window seat towards the rear to get a bit more sleep (0530 LAS – LAX flight). Towards the end of boarding a man taps me on the shoulder and not asks but states that I could sit over “there” point to an aisle seat. I point out, why not take the two seats next to me, and have your other daughter take the aisle seat (which was one row in front or behind on the same side).
Guy responds with, “no, we sit together”. Working crew even sided with me on this. Unfortunately, a uniformed commuting pilot with my company kinda stepped in and eventually I did move seats.
The kicker, in the area I moved to, three people around me got sick on landing. But at the end of the day, after explaining what happened to the CSM, they gave me a $50 voucher for future travel.
Bottom line, the entitlement factor is ridiculous, but at the same time, yes, the airlines do need to work on a ssystem that preassignes seats together upon booking for families.
And I’m sick of saying No…You have choices when you book like the rest of us.
Families and children are a burden on society.
Let’s start asking people to switch tables at restaurants.
It seems the time has come for airlines to create some automation for this in their apps. When reservations are made with children in them, the system can identify passengers with worse seats and systemically offer them the “upgrade” that would automatically change everyone’s seats if accepted. In cases where it’s not possible (only middle seats left, for example), it can offer the family rebooking options.
While a pretty big development effort, the issue is only getting more attention and the first airline to implement this would have some market advantage for families.
What surprised me is that on many airlines, like United, you can pick your seats before you pay for your ticket. Why would you book a flight and book seats apart and then pay while expecting someone to switch with you on the day of flight..
If your travel agency booked you either without seat assignments or seats apart without telling you then shame on them.
Lastly, if you did book seats apart, keep checking your booking on the web site or app as there are almost always cancellations that open up seats together. Be proactive and save yourself possible disappointment when your board.
Exactly. It’s what I do. But, like United, they re-assigned myself and family with no notice and separated us – even after paying for the seats I had. That was an unexpected surprise and, again, they did not notify me even though I have alerts, emails, etc… all turned on for the flight and for my United account.
Glenn —-
recently someone requested that we switch tables after we had been seated. Seems they needed an electrical outlet for a medical device and our table was nearest the required outlet. We had no issue switching given the obvious circumstances.
Later near the end of our meal they sent us a free desert at their expense – an unnecessary but generous gesture.
Gary, have you sat in an exit row recently?
I saw a very pregnant lady there. And remain there. There are no restrictions for the exit row.
And I’m sick and tired of reading articles were flight. Attendants are sick and tired of customers! They have truly forgot what their purposes. Don’t tell me it’s for our safety, because looking at the size of most flight attendants today, they’re definitely not there for my safety! That is a fact.
I have two criteria for agreeing to switch seats:
1) I will not switch to sit in a middle seat
2) I will not switch at all if the other person is demanding and pushy
I’ve traveled all over the world and I understand these “traveling hacks”. Sorry…your lack of planning is not my problem.
There are always exceptions. Wife and I were upgraded to F on a CR7. I got 1C, she got 2D. I asked at the gate if they could move us together. He said no, but to ask a passanger. I did, and the gentleman in 2C switched.
THEN……
The lady in 1D asked the same gentleman if he could switch with her under 10yr old son in 1A (I’m guessing they got upgraded also). He did again. So he got 1A, and the two families were happy. He seemed ok with it….a solo seat with a window and aisle!
@James,
There are clear restrictions for the exit row. The article outlined them. Do not opine when you don’t know what you are talking about.
One way you can diffuse the question when you don’t want to move is to answer the passenger asking you to switch: Yes, I will switch, … for $100!
So, now the decision is in the hand of the passenger, and if he/she is cheap with his/her family (that is 99% of the cases) then they will decline and go try to bully another passenger.
I pay for early boarding to get the seat I need. Then to be asked to change my seat is offensive. They expect you to change automatically but shame on us to ask if the are going to reimburse my early boarding fee.
I always book an aisle…nearer the lavatory…for “medical reasons.” I have been asked to change a seat a few times, but if it not for an equivalent aisle, I politely decline (without explanation; no one’s business), as I need access to the lav more than the average passenger. If, by chance another passenger got “pushy” about it, I’d simply ring the FA button, refer it over, and stop talking.
I saw No to all requests. When that doesn’t work and they want to try to argue, I tell them for me to move it is going to cost $5000. I find that gets them to move on. Families can easily check the seating chart in advance for the flight(s) they are considering to see what seats are open. It is on them to book a flight where they can sit together. They seem to book flights at the last second and think and expect the other passengers to bow down to them. Also if they want to sit together they can always fly private.
When flying as a family, you just have to plan farther in advance if you need seats together. Flight cancellations and other circumstances can foul up the best plan, but you have to start there.
Also, airlines can, and do, unilaterally change your pre-selected seats. My wife and I will often book two aisle seats, across the aisle from each other. Neither of us wants to be stuck in a middle seat. On a recent flight, Delta moved us from our chosen aisle-aisle seats to an aisle-middle pair of seats. When we inquired about why they would do that, the agent told us she saw we were booked together and tried to “help” us out so we could sit together. It turns out she was really just trying to accommodate another couple on the flight (probably with higher status) who wanted to sit together, and grabbed one of our seats to make it happen. Total B.S.
Simple: do as it used to be where people could select their seat free of charge. Airlines create a problem and then complain about it. Same for overhead storage: no issue in the 80’s and 90’s when people were checking their bags.
More requests because the airlines (United last time I experienced it), try to get you to upgrade your tickets because they threaten you’re not flying to Hawaii with you wife unless you fork over $50.
This article is so one sided. States all of these passengers are entitled. Assumes all seat trades are a worse choice for the person giving up their seat.
I have only once seen a family not work it out a few times. Always on full flights but if that’s the case move on.
These employees are overworked, everyone else is overpaying. This article seems to stoke fires that don’t need to be flamed.
Pro tip- if someone won’t move because they are an asshole and your kid has to sit alone, find someone nearby willing to switch and proceed to pass food and snacks and talk over that person for the remainder of the flight. Even better get up and stand in the aisle right next to the person every chance you get.
I travel frequently with my family of 4 ( kids 1 and 7). We always book early and our seats are always together-until the airline decides to split us up at the gate. This is especially true when we make a transfer. This happens 50% of the time and for reasons that are never fully explained. We ask, politely, to be seated together, and you would’ve thought we asked for someone’s kidney. On an international flight to Vienna this happened and the flight wasn’t full. Many people occupying the middle seats were camped out to stretch their legs after takeoff. No one would accommodate us, even though we had booked seats together initially. My 1 year old, whom I purchased their own seat, was now in my lap for a ten hour trip. The seven year old sat next to a creepy man who wouldn’t stop trying to talk to her, and my partner was somewhere out of eyesight. The airline would not refund us the extra seat. I’m not sure how this was the fault of my family, who planned the trip 6 months in advance. Am I entitled?
Flight attendance have no other job but to help passengers. What is to be tired off?
Before the Pandemia, flight attendance workers were helpful and kind to passengers. Now, they look more like dictators than attendance.
I always say no. Works like a dream. Americans get so upset.
I don’t understand the anger this brings up in so many people towards their fellow travellers. Why wouldn’t you trade for an equivalent or better seat if it helps someone else out? Conversely why would you even bother asking someone else to move from aisle/window to a middle seat? But you never know if someone might rather sit somewhere else anyways unless you ask. If I’m stuck in an aisle seat even in premium I’ll happily move back to coach for a window on longer flights. I would never even book a ticket where my minor child was separated from me, but I have had the airlines seperate us after the fact, usually for upgrades. Every time I’ve promptly brought this to the airline’s attention and they’ve fixed it. I’ve found they’re usually happy to move around all those travellers who didn’t select seats or give someone else a free upgrade to keep families together. Of course I actually value my family enough that I’ll give up upgrades to sit with them.
The hatred for children on this thread is ridiculous.
Young children need to be seated by a caregiver. There should not be a charge for this. Being under the age of 10 should not cause you or your caregiver to have to spend extra money reserving seats for BOTH passengers (reservations, meanwhile, that will not be honored even though your money is gone if you are forced onto a different flight due to cancelation or delay).
As another commentator said, though, the airlines could easily automate this. And while a young child should be entitled to sit by a caregiver, that is not an entitlement for a whole family to sit together or to a desirable set of seats. (Still, on most domestic flights, this will mean one of them will get a window or aisle while the other gets a middle seat).
When we purchase 3 tickets 6 months in advance please put them together. You purposely separate the 3 seats and charge us to sit together. That will stop all this. Don’t blame the family for the airlines greed.
@minos…exactly right. I get 3 free checked bags as a Delta DM (I check 2 bags every week..one is personal stuff, one is work stuff). But, if airlines allowed 1 free checked bag, everything would be better…
Don – I’d put you down.
I wouldn’t move for Mother Teresa. What chance do you think an entitled nobbit like you is going to have?
To the person who says if a person wouldn’t move their seat , let your kid and you pass food back and forth in front of them, you’d be pretty hungry . If you did it in front of me your food would be on the floor. It’s not my problem you’re to cheap to pay to sit with your kid, I’m thinking your the a__hole.
Bhahaaa. The Mary and Joseph’s… what does that make the grown adult; or flight attendant who’s upset about keeping a family together? Satan?
I propose we discuss/ protest the size of seats on an aircraft… While my daughter and I fit comfortably in said chairs, most Americans don’t! I had a guy, pouring over into my chair whilst snoring..Not cool. Like wtf.
We need weight and size restrictions. Not a debate about splitting up kids from their parents.
I almost always say no. If asked to go to middle, no exceptions to the “no”.
If the other person is pushy or demanding, I ignore them.
I have been asked an FA once to accommodate. I complied, only because the FA was nice about it.
Flying in general SUCKS…..I drive when possible even if it’s a 24 hours run to avoid flying. I’m old enough to remember when flying was a good experience over all. No I would rather go to the dentist.
Been flying for work for 25 years. In all that time, I’ve never been asked to trade seats where I got one even equal to the one I was sitting in. Pound sand.
I have gave up my seat to accommodate more than one traveler before but I refused to do this anymore. I usually paid additional to get my seat assigned ahead of trips, so I will not under any circumstances give up my seat. People have all types of excuses for sitting together, they can do as I, pay for the seat. That’s my take on this issue, pay for what you want.
As a flight attendant for the love of God just book your seats as far in advance as you can if you’re traveling with family but especially kids. We get lots of people who think it’s required that airlines sit families together, this is false as the DOT has it as a recommendation to the airlines. If your child is less than 10 years old that’s the only way I’m happy to accommodate you, otherwise your a burden on the flight crew just trying to get that door closed on time. Also ask for accommodation towards the end of boarding, it’s irritating to get requests from 5 families when we still have an entire plane to board (most of the time they just all decide to sit together despite their assign seats and just expect us and the other guests to just figure it out). I’m a ULCC FA so 90% of the time it’s just a family being to frugal to pay extra to book the seats together, don’t make that someone else’s problem!
Luckily I don’t have these problems as I fly business class.
I don’t ask to change seats last flight I took we had a lack of planning so we didn’t get seats together we were separated the entire trip but I never complained if I want to switch I am willing yo.offer up a 100 dollar bill for the switch but like I said I don’t ask to switch
Flying sucks the seats are to small. The people were ok for the most part, a family wanted me and my wife to move so they could sit together but never asked
I heard them whispering
I would have said NO .!!
THEY WERE CLOSE ENOUGH TO SEE EACH OTHER
I was asked to give up my bulk head-aisle seat so a disabled mom & her son could sit together. I was told I could be comped a glass of red wine – I don’t drink.
I was switched to a seat in the middle of the plane. My back was screaming at me once we landed 90 minutes later & it was hours before I could get to sleep when I got home. Never again.
I was on a Air New Zealand flight recently. To pick a seat you need to pay. I paid and picked a window seat a month before the flight. Well when I was boarding I realized the airline changed me to a middle seat in the back next to the bathroom. They had put a family in my paid seat!!! I talked to a flight attendant who said she could not do anything but to call up the airline and get a refund!!!
Ridiculous!!
After the flight I called them up and after being on hold for a hour I talked to a rep. To get my money back they want me to send a email with all these requirements. Jerks!
.
My fantasy….enlarge the hold area. Put the families that are obnoxious and entitled there. They get to be together and the rest of us get peace! Especially if there’s a screaming baby.
As a flight attendant I gave up asking people to move long ago. I had a woman with a 3 y.o. seated apart and couldn’t get anyone to change. I exist for people to say NO to. But stand there with your kid and ask for a switch and no one will tell you no.
I let the passengers handle it themselves.
I have well in excess of 1million travel miles. In all my years of traveling. I have given up my seat a small number of times. Everytime those asking have been exceedingly polite. I honestly think most of this “discussion” stems from a few obnoxious people (both the asker and the askee) who now can now broadcast there “righteous” complaint to the world. I have traveled extensively with family and have ALWAYS been able to make my seat accommodations for all family when buying my tickets. A little planning goes a long way. For those who do not get seated together have simply made poor preplanning so they are at the mercy of those around them and may just have to deal with it.
I had a father who was sitting in an aisle row try to get me to give up my window seat which I requested 6 months in advance. I told him no. So he swore at me, harassed me, and made my life miserable for the flight. Attendants didnt do anything about him. I will never give up my seat to anyone on principle now.
I agree… but, the fact is, if there is an emergency a child should be seated next to a parent. We don’t want to give up seats for comfort, but we forget we are 30k feet in the air. We were all once kids, don’t forget that.
Gary, it’s time to ban ‘corporate wage slave’ (he/she isn’t the cws from FT).
“The Department of Transportation has been pressuring airlines to accommodate seat assignments for families FREE OF CHARGE.”
Typical democratic party narrative. Give people stuff for free so they’ll continue to vote democrat.
Most people would call that buying votes.
I count my lucky stars that I haven’t been asked to switch seats. Yet.
On a side note: anyone else read the headline and think “I do declare, Scarlet!”
I always get a window seat as I take meds and before takeoff I am zonked. I never use the onboard bathroom and don’t want anyone bothering me to get thru. Good luck getting someone zonked out to move. I consider flying this way to be like time travel without jet lag.
If polite and of equal accommodation – YES…..
If pushy, arrogant, entitled, or rude – HELL NO….
If over 2 hr flight – DON’T BOTHER ASKING!!
I travel weekly and am often asked to switch. My rules are simple. The seat being offered must be a window in an equal class or a window / aisle in an upgraded class. I will never move to a middle seat and I will never move down in class. Also, don’t bother asking anyone in an exit row to switch unless you are offering a non middle class upgraded seat. You’re wasting your time.
This whole topic is really pretty simple. If you are the one doing the asking here are the rules:
1) Be polite
2) Be offering at minimum an equivalent seat and “equivalent” is up to the discretion of the person being asked. It doesn’t hurt to throw in a “here’s $50” or “I’ll buy your drinks” where appropriate.
3) Be prepared for a “no” and don’t act entitled. The person you are asking might just not want to move period and that’s their right.
Having said that when it’s a case of a minor child who needs (doesn’t just prefer) a parent sitting with them the airline should sort that out before boarding. If it’s your spouse/boyfriend/17 year old son sorry there is no need for you to be sitting together.
Every time there is a discussion on this there a million sob stories and individual incidents. I am sorry for the mixups and I know that sometimes it really isn’t your fault. Having said that the people who abuse this (like mentioned in the article) or simply don’t plan ahead and expect you to pay for their lack of preparation are simply too frequent and I CAN’T TELL WHICH ONE YOU ARE. So I’m forced to assume you can/will lie to me and are trying to exploit me. Sorry.
I get asked often to move (as a solo traveler) and it’s annoying as heck. I pay close attention to where I sit on a plane, for various reasons. And I’m almost always asked to trade for my better seat. (I’ve had the bulkhead scenario happen to me as well.). I have noticed the airlines – specifically Delta – moving me around without asking me. When I board I find Im in a different seat so they can seat a couple together (even for just an hour flight). Pisses me off when they do that.
Botton line. Suck it up and don’t ask people to move.
Too damn bad if they don’t book their flight early enough to get seats together. I’ve seen arguments on planes over this and people who refuse to swap seats are shamed.
As a frequent flyer I could care less about switching seats, I even offer to. If I don’t, I know the parent with the baby will sit next to me and I’ll be stuck with a crying baby.
We were very lucky, our kids were great on flights. Literally every time we flew people would comment on how great they did.
I feel sorry for the parents who didn’t get that lucky and try to help them as much as I can. I even let a lady use my laptop once to play a cartoon for her son.
Happy baby, happy flight.
I was asked to move twice by a flight attendant on an international flight. I was traveling alone so no big deal, I complied. The third time she came and said grab your bag and come with me. First class baby.
Don’t ask me to trade my extra legroom seat with you to sit with your family, GO OFFER your extra legroom seat to the person in the back next to your family. I won’t give up for your needs, but you should.
I always travel First Class or Premium and plan my travel accordingly, even when my children were young and they traveled with me. I will never give up my seat nor would I expect someone to give up their seat for me due to poor planning or an inconvenient unforeseen issue. Should be no one else’s problem.
I’m an old Gen Xer. I’m confused at the entitlement of some people. I guess the generation I grew up in, you took what you got. I have standards, but I don’t inconvenience people and expect the same in return. These jackals who always expect their way, I don’t get it. Where’s civility and respect?
Flying Qantis Airlines from Seattle to Sydney I asked to switch seats with the pilot, told him I was a pilot also (didn’t tell him it was model airplane’s I piloted) and he accompanied me. Well if course I let the Co-Pilot take off because I forgot to bring my remote controller, Hell I don’t think it has enough channels anyway. Well after we took off we got clearance to cruise at 37,000 feet so we set the auto pilot for that height and as soon as we reached altitude the Co-Pilot said he over ate a crapload of Mexican food last night, drank several pitchers of Pineapple Margaritas and that he needed to go take a humongous shit and find some hangover medicine and a half dozen aspirin, he was desperately hoping for a restroom to be vacant because he was about to shit himself, I told him if he did not to come back, (Im not sure what I was thinking because I have no idea hot to fly this European piece of shit) anywho so with nothing I could say I said okay go and Good Luck. Well after that I woke up and had to go to the bathroom so I have no idea how my dream ended. Kind of glad I did wake up though because I don’t want to ever be involved in any Airline Disasters!!
Have a nice day everyone…..
Flying Qantis Airlines from Seattle to Sydney I asked to switch seats with the pilot, told him I was a pilot also (didn’t tell him it was model airplane’s I piloted) and he accompanied me. Well if course I let the Co-Pilot take off because I forgot to bring my remote controller, Hell I don’t think it has enough channels anyway. Well after we took off we got clearance to cruise at 37,000 feet so we set the auto pilot for that height and as soon as we reached altitude the Co-Pilot said he over ate a crapload of Mexican food last night, drank several pitchers of Pineapple Margaritas and that he needed to go take a humongous shit and find some hangover medicine and a half dozen aspirin, he was desperately hoping for a restroom to be vacant because he was about to shit himself, I told him if he did not to come back, (Im not sure what I was thinking because I have no idea how to fly this European piece of shit) anywho so with nothing I could say I said okay go and Good Luck. Well after that I woke up and had to go to the bathroom so I have no idea how my dream ended. Kind of glad I did wake up though because I don’t want to ever be involved in any Airline Disasters!!
Have a nice day everyone…..
I don’t fly enough to really have an opinion but just wanted to throw my 2¢ worth of comedy in because laughter is the best medicine!!
I’m sick of reading articles about what service workers are sick of.
Is it just me or does anyone else notice the decline in service in way too many businesses?
I was on a flight DFW/LAS. I was in my chosen, always, aisle seat. Next to me was a father and young 5/6 yo daughter. The father asked me to change seats with mom two rows back. I replied “as long as it was an aisle seat” The mother was sitting in the aisle seat. We exchanged. The aircraft was still boarding. Another women stood over me and indicated I was in her seat. Mom was assigned the middle seat. I returned to my original assigned seat and told the mother I wanted my assigned aisle seat back. She complied.
The father began telling the young daughter “the man is not nice enough to change seat with mommy” My first reaction was to say mentally, “F**k you” I maintained my composure.
The father began requesting the cabin crew to make switches. One crew made a snarky comment about passengers not accommodating. Another mental expletive for him. I told him I would happily accept another aisle seat in coach, even a window seat in first class.
After playing musical chairs with about five participants; I got an aisle seat, the family sat together. A positive unintended consequence, another non complaining couple got to sit together.
People try to punk you all of the time. Don’t fall for it. A woman and her adult daughter tried to get me give up my selected window seat for the daughter’s middle seat further back. If it had worked, they would have had a free seat between them and I would have been stuck in a tight fit between to other people and would have had to get out at least several times for the window person back there. I didn’t figure out their plan until later but I was not going easily to a middle seat so I refused. As it was, the daughter moved up to the open middle seat next to me and the two of them traded seats several times. A lot of people really don’t mind screwing accommodating good people.
As a parent with 2 special needs kids, I can tell you, I’ve never wanted to get anybody’s premium seat. I always book far in advance, unless there is an emergency (someone is dying or died).
Airlines are horrific about changing people’s seating, even when you book in advance and while I always pay premium to seat all of us together, it doesn’t always work out perfectly. Not because I’m lazy, or didn’t plan… That’s just the way flying is these days. If I ask someone to switch, I always try to make sure the seat I’m offering is the same type of seat (aisle for aisle, window for window, etc).
I agree that you should never give up your seat for other grown people to be happy, you might consider that with teenage girls (who are often sexually assaulted during flights) and kids with special needs or even small kids who need attending, your flight might be a helluva lot worse than not getting the first seat you chose. I always try to be near the person who is being asked during the request, so they can see we are not requesting this just because of preference.
There is no one size all that fits here, but: people who ask to change seats when they don’t really need it are arseholes and people who don’t change seats for people who truly need it are also arseholes.
Just say no
Poor little flight attendant
Thought they were there, amongst other things, to assist the passengers to make the customer’s travel experience a pleasant one
And that is CUSTOMER as in the person paying their salary. Hate is a strong word.
When booking a flight if you notice you can’t sit together change the flight.
Every single airline allows you to purchase specific seats when you book your flight. It’s usually no more than a few dollars. If you care so much about sitting as a family pre select your seats. Otherwise you are the unaccommodating, entitled jerk causing issues for yourselves and also others. No one OWES anyone anything and that’s the point of articles that discuss this. Yes occasionally if it’s convenient and the plane is crowded its a nice thing to accommodate a family the issue is that people now a days expect and demand that others just give them what they want no matter the inconvenience. Again it’s not anyone else’s problem you did not properly prepare for your flight and the world does not owe you anything!
Firstlast…you should have told the father to go “F” himself in a tactful way. It was his lying sneak of a wife that tried to pass off someone else’s seat in the switch. The daughter needed to hear that it was daddy and mommy that were not nice! Entitled pieces of cr@p…
It is extraordinarily rude to ask someone to switch seats on an airline. If I go into a restaurant and order a filet mignon and someone asks me to trade it for a hamburger, the answer is always NO. Neither will I change my aisle seat or window seat for a middle seat.
When I fly, it is for company business. When families fly, they are typically off to meet family or friends, or off on a vacation. I need my aisle seat and have never given it up for a family as they are headed to Disney or other, whereas I am headed to work as soon as I get off the plane.
Besides, all that switching around creates further unwanted confusion when everyone else is trying to board with luggage that should have been checked or left at home which is another sore topic.
Only once. my seat was upgraded from economy to first next to CEO from Lucas films. Nice.
Maybe after years of this kind of nuisance I only fly 1st class because of this issue and a couple other issues with flying. I will never change seats. Plan ahead and get what you pay for.
People that fly are not usually very friendly in the first place or so has been my experience.
My daughter and son in law missed a flight coming home from Florida to Philly. They were able to book a flight for two later that evening and another flight the next day. They had a toddler and an infant. My son in Law took the first flight with the three year old. Unfortunately the seats were not together. They were about 3 or 4 rows apart. My sonin law asked a couple of ladies if they would mind moving over a seat just for takeoff so that he could sit close to my grandson. They refused and then complained to him when my grandson screamed bloody murder when the flight took off. He wasn’t asking for them to give up their seat for the entire flight just for takeoff.
If families want to sit together, pay for tickets together. Don’t ask me to swap my 10C for 20A. The answer is a hard NO. When our children were young we typically sat together but sometimes a reschedule or equipment change had us apart. No big. Explain to the child (we have two girls) what is happening. Buck up, buttercup. The level of entitlement is astounding.
@K8tee:
“teenage girls (who are often sexually assaulted during flights)”
Exaggerate much?
I have the best solution to this entire problem. All children under the age of 15 should not be allowed to Fly at all. Period. Take a friggin bus or train.
And I always pay to upgrade and sit in the seat I want, and have never agreed to move seats to accommodate anyone.
My answer in never again unless it is an upgrade. I gave up my row 2A seat (on Spirit) to a mother with two small children. They were booked in 1A,B,and C. Spirit doesn’t allow small children in Row 1. So I moved to 1A, and my fellow row mate moved to 1C. I got to spend the rest of my flight with a little boy kicking the back of my seat. Mom was ambivalent.
Last year we booked flights to HI 7 months in advanced. Traveling with a two year old. Had seating all selected so families sat together. 3 months later flight change with everyone scrambled. Called cust service at AA. She was fantastic. Put notes in to say keep kids with parents and made new seat assignments. Three weeks before flight changed again. Tried calling again and was told talk to gate agent. Gate agent said you’ll have to ask people to move. Our two year old was sitting between two strangers for a 6 hour flight.
Failure to properly plan on your part does not great an emergency on my part
Believe it or not, i was supposed to be seated in a seat next to a 350 lb. fatso. She had had to put up the armrest and I explained I could no way sit in the little space left. She demanded the flight attended to put her else where and the bright United attendant put her in an exit row. I am not sure she could have fit through that door. If one cannot push away from the table, try buying two seats. It is like a fat disabled? person parking by the front of a store. For obese people with no reason other than eating too much, they should have special parking places at the end of the parking lot so they can walk off some of that blubber.
I prowl the seating charts before I push ‘pay’. I need an aisle seat, not near the toilets. Not at the back of the plane. Period. I am willing to pay for it and/or book a different flight. When flying alone I look like ‘the nice lady’ who will switch and it is hard for me to say no…but I explain that I need that particular flavor aisle for my own personal comfort, I paid for it, planned it carefully and that if it is not equivalent seat… I am sorry, but no. Also I agree that ‘entitled’ has infected the cabins. On recent Tokyo-LA flight was flying biz with my husband. Family got on. The UAL middle biz seats have 2 configurations – facing in or facing away from one another but still together. A woman flying with a 4 year old was up in arms bc her seats were not the facing in ones and basically demanded from the flight attendant that she be able to switch with us because ‘I can’t take care of my child properly’ …really!? You are like literally 6 inches away. In business class. I have flown to 6 continents with my son starting when he was 7 weeks (he’s 19 now) and so that was def a bull$^% reason. Also her hubby was in same aisle as her in the ‘throne’ seat. So they wanted him to be able to move as well to same row. She was super pushy and demanding. And loud. Finally a couple a couple of rows up relented and said ‘ok we’ll switch’ – got their stuff, etc. and then the lady changed her mind!?!? I can’t imagine what it would be like to be married to her. LOL
It is the responsibility of a parent to do the due diligence and pay the price to travel with their family in a manner that is satisfactory to them. It is not a stranger’s responsibility.
If they can’t handle that simple duty, get an RV and travel by yourselves!
I agree with you. I traveled internationally and domestically for my job for 34 years. I have real horror stories about other people’s “entitled ” attitudes. Such as the 350 pound smelly woman who couldn’t fit in one seat, crying babies, passengers who smelled like goats, etc. I would have loved to change seats. But, I had to ‘suck it up’ and put up with it.
Nope. If you didn’t book your seats together and you can’t, tough titty. Besides having most of you separated from one another could be helpful to the other passengers, because together you might be loud, vulgar, rambunctious and disturbing of other people’s peace. No one with a confirmed seat is obligated to give their seat up for you. Deal with it. I 0kjyryt k
My reply is very simple:”You decided to have kids, so live with any and all consequences!”.
Don’t assign kids seats away from their parents. I was one of the annoying ones that had to ask because United assigned my 4 year old to a seat 6 rows behind us by himself when our flight got changed. That only happened to us once but I see it happen to families often. I totally get it tho if someone paid more for their seats, why are those people even being asked to move? That’s not right. Other than that, I practice common (not so common, I guess) courtesy by getting out of the way so others can pass and organizing my bags and kid’s bags after people go by. It’s not the majority of families. I love how this person “hates families”. Awesome. I see just as much entitlement with other travelers. Like the ones who are talking loudly on their phone until take off, wheels up, or the ones that don’t care to use headphones and think we all want to hear the games they’re playing or videos they’re watching. People suck in general. Don’t just blame those with kids. Adults without children are just as annoying.
My kids are now 16 and 13 and have been flying since the day they were born – both with >150 segments. They have flown WN, AS, AA/US, UA, LH, DL, EK, NZ, QF, MX and TAP and not once – repeat never – have we asked another passenger to change seats. If you book in advance it is not difficult to reserve adjacent seats or at worst 2+2. Even when flights are cancelled we have not had a problem with reseating. WN has an easy solution – buy EBCI and you will have no trouble getting adjacent seats.
So I have zero sympathy for the families that decided to roll the dice instead of paying for seat assignments. Suck it up, or be prepared to be separated from your kids.
The writer of this article no doubt flies a lot. I’m a flight attendant, so he doesn’t fly more than I do. Parents with teenage children do solicit seat changes for various reasons. And it’s not just families who hustle seat changes to be together. It’s couple, friends colleagues and the like. When I do travel, I travel alone. And when asked to give up my seat for those reasons stated above, I take out my AirPods, inform them that I’m keeping my assigned seat and put my AirPods back in and go on about my business. End of story. People may be entitled, but I’m not there to feed their entitlement.
Book early online when possible.
Last minute/stand by passengers be glad you even have a seat. I would never ask you so don’t ever ask me. Remember to ask your guardians why they raised a jerk after you land.
I’ve been a flight attendant nearly 46 years. I never heard of a “Mary & Joseph”. So, no…. it’s not a universal term. Your long suffering needs to learn, (a.) people have always asked others to trade seats to seat families together. (b.) working in the public requires a certain ability to look at the human condition and not take human (there’s that word again) nature personally. (c.) air safety notwithstanding, you’re in a SERVICE business.
As many interesting things as there are in aviation, I wonder about this writer’s proclivity to chase such non-stories.
@K8tee:
“teenage girls (who are often sexually assaulted during flights)”
Love your “Alternative facts” . The things some “people” say on here are total Kellyanne Conway. Making up stuff just makes your entire point false.
did your mom die in the towers too?
Poor planning by others is their own problem, not anyone else’s, So is being cheap and not upgrading to sit with your family.
I feel that if the airline doesn’t give seats together for families, then it’s perfectly OK to ask. I fly solo all the time. I don’t mind changing seats for people with young children. I’ve even offered to change seats with someone who was obviously not ok with a crying baby next to them. I don’t mind that either. However, if the airline does allow to purchase adjoining seats, then the family needs to plan ahead, if possible. That said, emergencies happen. The flight attendant needs to get over it or get another job. The service industry is just that – servicing customers’ needs.
My position in life is not to accommodate your family.
My conditions for requests are as follows:
1) Automatic no for seats that are paid upgrades without compensation (lower category, worse location, etc.) and if I need my seat for whatever reason (feeling off, tired, etc.)
2) Maybe yes if seat is same category or higher, or if compensation is same or higher than I originally paid
3) Auto yes if seat is higher class
I used to travel professionally as a CPS worker & legally couldn’t be separated from the children I was transporting to/from another state, so IF/when it would have become an issue … I just would have stated that legal responsibility & let the FA’s handle it any further!!
Personally, my own 2 sons always used to travel with my (now-ex) husband & I (1 seated w/ each one of us — planned ahead, of course as I did w/ my work kids) & there NEVER was a problem when we went anywhere like this on airlines!!
First, it is these families when they make reservations or do on-line check-in, that absolutely refuse to pay for seats, so they can sit together. They expect the airline, the flight crew and other passengers to accommodate their needs!!! That is absolutely wrong!!! If one needs to have 2 seats together, pay for them! Or go fly Southwest!!!
Second, if one pays extra for their seat, NO ONE should be asking them to move, to accommodate anyone else!!! I had this happen on a United flight, O’Hare to Frankfurt. We paid for bulkhead seats. The FA asked us to change, we said no, unless you can offer us something better. She refused! About 2 hours after take-off, I went to the lavatory. The whole Economy+ section was empty! There was one woman with a baby in an area of 40 empty seats!!! 40 EMPTY seats!!! Yeah I was pissed! This same flight had older male flight attendant who did absolutely nothing the whole flight! During boarding he stood at side of the aircraft and did ABSOLUTLY NOTHING!!! When the beverage and meal carts came down the aisle, he just stood by the cart. Never spoke to passengers, or even touch a beverage or meal tray. I did contact United about that. Never received a reply. That is why I moved most of travel to Delta.
I believe that passengers are at fault, the majority of times when it to comes to sitting together. They refuse to pay seat fees and want to blame everyone else for this issue.
I agree with much of what’s being said. But in defense of the complaining flight attendant, it’s not her job to assign seats. That’s the reservation/check-in/ gate attendants job. It should be sorted out BEFORE boarding so passengers and flight attendants are not disturbed. If a passenger wants to ask another to move, be polite and accept a no if that’s the case. It is NOT either the flight attendant’s or the passenger’s problem. Complain to the airline or call a supervisor to the gate. Handle your own problems when flying, and don’t cause problems for passengers or flight attendants doing their jobs. Flying stinks for everyone these days… passengers and.staff alike. It’s a sign of our cultural and economic times. Certainly not the fault of us ordinary people, so let’s grin and bear it together.
Cool. They are entitled to their opinion. New rule. Place the infants and children next to the single travelers. Start calling flight sttendants the “nannies of the sky” since mom and dad are unable to do anything to help, as they are seated elsewhere. Some people complain just to vent instead of offering solutions or opportunities. No one wants to hear that negativity anymore. Offer a way to improve or if you have none please keep your complaoning to yourself.
DO BETTER.
In response to the person saying that families should pay the extra to sit together, that is ridiculous. Families have already paid the outrageous amounts for plane tickets as it is, then to add the extra charge of choosing a seat is ridiculous. Everyone buying a plane ticket sold be allowed to choose their seat from what is available. Period. Otherwise, the same could be said about first class. If you don’t want someone asking you to switch, you spend the extra and go to first class. Or, simply say “No,” when asked, and let it go.
There is no problem asking. I tell my children that the answer will always be no unless you ask. If the answer is still No after you ask then accept it and move on. No one is obligated to accommodate your request.
1KBrad I agree with you..ANything for votes..$10,000-$20,000 off school loans!!!Thx Joe
When you purchase 2 or more airline tickets the seat information is on the ticket and if you see a ticket with seat #22 and another with seat #35 that should tell you that the seats are not together and you should try to get the ticket agent to get you seats that will be together if not, no people cannot switch seats once they are on board it’s a safety issue, if the there’s an emergency on the plane the ntsb and other government agencies are going to ask the airline for a list of passengers with the assigned seats for each passenger, and if something happens and there is a switch of seats on the plane the airline has no record of that and that could turn into a problem for the passengers that switched seats when is time to identify a passenger for restitution in case there’s an accident and the passengers are unidentifiable,
A child an an adult do not get the same amount of money incase of a payout by an airline , there are lots of variables and the passengers seat assignments are a very crucial part of the prosses, ,,passenger’s must seat at they’re assigned seats no if and or buts about it, it’s a safety concern for all involved.
What about if the person who switches seats with another is determined to be the cause of the accident and crash of said airplane , the airlines must turn over a detailed seating assignment list to government officials in case of any emergency
How horrible the airlines have made people believe that asking to sit as a family is such a tragedy. It’s a flipping seat like a bus or a train big deal, be accommodating! Airlines have screwed their customers for decades sardine style and worse!!!
You want my solo seat? Pay for my airfair. Otherwise, book you fukamly seats together. How stupid are you to book them apart?!
I don’t want to be asked or harrassed unless I am getting a better seat. Your problems are not my concern. The airline staff doesn’t have to like it either. These request put them in the middle of a seat war. Attendants will not win this battle. CONSUMERS!! Buy the seat and don’t be cheap.
I’ll switch seats seats anytime if I am flying solo – really, if you want my seat & you have a family or other circumstances, it’s yours
NFW. If you are too freakin’ stupid, or lazy or cheap to get your seats together, it is definitely not my problem.
Well, families are sick of selfish solo travelers taking up middle seats. Expecting people to pay extra to sit next to their child is ridiculous. Don’t be a dick…
100% disagree with the author.
I am asked all the time to switch seats as a solo business traveler for families and I always decline.
Buying me a drink or giving me $20 is in no way fair compensation for my time and discomfort on a flight.
The examples given in the post my be poor, but I’m sorry families you should pay more for flying together.
I was cabin crew for 35 years and never liked parents asking for help switching seats so that the family could all sit together. One guy said that “One person can’t take care of a toddler alone!”. To which I replied, “My mother flew with seven kids, all within 9 years and different seats.”
It was easy. You behave or your father is going to hear about it. Of course that was in the 1970’s.
I will be flying to Ohio from Colorado in May and have paid more for a front seat to stretch my legs. I had a total knee replacement that wasn’t perfect and unfortunately can’t keep my leg bent or straight for any length of time. I wear a brace and sometimes carry a cane. I am also a senior citizen. I surely hope no one asks to change seats with me.
I was forced to pay for seats together when traveling with my 8 year old grandson on Allegiant Airlines. That should be the requirement on all airlines. This is how fights start on planes. When someone pays for a seat they want to sit there.
I haven’t flown for about 5 years, but I didn’t know seat swapping was even an option after you board the plane. You’re assigned a seat at the gate if not before, and I thought that’s where the FAA will be looking for you if the plane goes down. I don’t think it’s right for these pax to dump this “problem” on people flying in the seat they purchased.
Seat change, no problem, $100.00. If it involves children $150. Don’t like it? Either find someone else, shut up or pay up.
As a mom of 4 who books everyone together regardless of cost (11, 8, 5, 3), sometimes I can’t control the airline and their issues. Like the airline, not being able to depart because of some mechanical issue. The plane’s departure was delayed, missed our connecting flight, so we had to reschedule and the next flight doesn’t have any seats together but 2, 2, and 1 option. I’m not asking for primo seats but I would like to seat with my 3 and 5 yo. I just passed snacks and stuff between everyone between us. We fly 2-3 times a year to visit family. The airline knew they were at fault for the issue but they wouldn’t help me get at least my 2 youngest with me. On the second leg of the flight, the attendant was amazing and got us all together in the very back of the plane. So I know it is possible, with someone who gives effort.
The comment made by the flight attendant doesn’t make sense. Saying she had to ask single women to move from the emergency row so kids can sit there isn’t true. Kids can’t sit in the emergency row. Seems like someone just wanted some attention.
Almost always it’s a bad seat they want to swap for a good seat.
I’ve never had anyone want to trade their aisle seat for my middle, but they want to trade their middle for my aisle.
Sorry,if families can’t afford to fly together that’s their problem. Plan ahead or drive your family to theiŕ destination.Don’t ask me because i will flat out tell you the truth. Your poor planning is not an emergency to me! Mark G.
I recall once a guy was in my seat when I boarded, I told him he was in my seat. He said he wanted to sit next to his twin daughters, I looked at his girls and said ok. I asked him where his seat was, it turned out it was the last row (window) blocked in by two fat guys. Being claustrophobic, I couldn’t do it, fortunately, the flight attendant found me a middle seat between two small good looking women. If the guy wasn’t with his daughters, I would have demanded him to get up. I didn’t appreciate him taking my seat without asking.
God forbid you have to do your job…. They have a right to ask people to change seats, and the person they’re asking has every right to say no. Why are you acting like it’s outrageous for someone to ask?! No one is being forced to say yes. If you don’t want to move then it’s very simple… Don’t freaking move! The world is an utter train wreck and here we have people bitching about being asked a simple question that they could have refused. FFS
I once had to fly cross country with my two boys , my oldest who was 8 at the time with a day old casted broken arm and my youngest who was 2 years old and has autism. Nightmare situation for me because my wife was on a different flight meeting us there the next day. The only reason I managed to survive this ordeal was the fact that I had spent the extra money for a ticket for my 2 year old even though 2 year Olds fly for free . This way I guaranteed myself that my little one was seated right beside me. That’s what I needed to do as a responsible parent, no help needed. People are just cheap and expect things to just be given to them at other people expenses. Bs if you tell me.
If you’re going to switch be sure to look at their ticket to make sure the seat they are switching out for is actually Theirs. People have no problem lying right to your face.
There’s no reason to get upset over it. I’m a solo traveler and I’ve only been asked a couple times out of hundreds and hundreds of flights. I simply decline and put my headphones on. They’ve never persisted.
#1 I will (and have) ALWAYS volunteer (without being asked) to offer my aisle for a middle to accommodate what I feel is a reasonable accommodation (single parent traveling with two seven year olds in different rows)
#2 Flight attendents are shirking their union-negotiated responsibilities by not enforcing many airline rules and guidelines – such as allowing passengers to “carry on” grossly oversized bags – and this is a big contributor to the overall flying problem.
We usually fly Southwest because it is the carrier that has non-stop flights to the destinations we want to go. I recently read an article that described a new policy idea that Southwest might implement. It will allow families to board before everyone else but they have to sit in the back of the plane. That sounds like a reasonable way to solve the issue.
Maybe the airlines can make more money by selling flights as standing room only. Pay a surcharge to actually sit down. That and, all airplanes should have only pay toilets.
What a delightful industry.
This problem would not even exist if airlines stopped monetizing every aspect of a flight and go back to the original business model of the flight including the cost of the seats and luggage. Then people would be able to pick their seats at time of booking and the seat swap issue would go away.
If I pay extra for a seat I don’t care about you or ur kids. Fuck u and those kids. Are you going to reimburse me the extra money to get this seat. If not FUCK OFF.
You know u traveling with kids. Buy ur dam seats together or resedule your flight. Don’t be an inconvenience for someone else because you didn’t do your due diligence.
I’m sick of flight attendants.
If families can’t plan far enough ahead to buy seats together, maybe they need to take the bus.
A lot of comments here… “It’s ok if they ask and it’s ok if they say no”
You’re absolutely right, the problem is I’ve been in situations where saying no left the person being hostile or nasty, or the person next to me they were trying to sit next to being rude and nasty. That’s totally out of line, it was my right to say no for the seat I paid extra for.
Ultimately, unless you’re flying southwest, when you book your tickets book them together. If you don’t, it’s you’re fault and can’t be guaranteed.
I always fly with my husband. I always plan ahead and pay extra to ensure that we sit together. We have had someone ask us to switch seats with them on almost every flight we had. Our seats were always in economy section and a window seat and middle seat. We always let these people know that we paid to have our seats together and it’s not our fault that you didn’t do the same. To play on other people’s heart strings to give up their seats that they paid for is bullhockey. One person said they had better seats and i went to check only to find out they were next to the bulkhead in the back. When i came back, two kids were our seats. I promptly lifted both of them out of my seat when they refused to move. The flight attendant ce back and saud i needed go back to my assigned seats.When I showed her my tickets and after explaining what had happened, she apologized. So after that experience
Unless your going to upgrade both of us to first class, don’t ask.
As a frequent flyer, if I paid extra for a seat with extra legroom I prefer not to change seats if asked. Now there were times me and my husband sat in different rows and we did not ask anyone to switch seats so we can be together. I know its different for families with small children, but this really should be taken care of with the gate agent and not when you board the flight. My pet peeve is people taking your seat when you get on the plane and then ask you if it is alright so they can sit next to loved one or family now THAT IS RUDE!!
Everyone in one way or another pays for the seat on most airlines from main economy up. it’s either part of the cost of the class you choose, you’ve choose to upgrade, etc.
Parents it sucks you have to pay for X # of tickets and seats, but everyone does. You don’t get to skip that option if sitting together is important, and it should be. Under x age your kid sits on your lap unless you pay for a seat. Over that age you are required to buy a seat.
Plan better and stop expecting anyone to make concessions for you. You are not special. You are a group. Book together or don’t and deal with the outcomes.
Sure ask, because you never know, but don’t assume.
For instance, you get on and just decide to sit in the seat knowing it’s not yours. then when the person arrives you ask. now that is entitlement and privilege at its finest. Wait for the person to arrive then ask. give them the respect of not feeling forced because you and your family decided to take over the seat.
Note, I don’t care you will move or be paying for my upgrade.
It’s common sense for airlines to sit families together the best they can with the crazy things happening now days it’s just the normal right thing to do especially if there is teens or children if the flight attendants find this disturbing they need to get out of this profession and find a job they really like. Coming from a customer service background , this is a customer service role I suggest they get the option always when booking the flight.
Hmmm. I might have to call bs on this article. The only time(s) my family didn’t get seated together was on flights where I’ve pre-selected the seats together when I booked it and the airline changed them and separated us. It’s happened at least twice. And eff yes, I’m always going to start with the flight crew/gate because it’s their responsibility.
I believe this issue boils down to whether a passenger wants to give up their seat. If they say no , then that is fine. Flights are long and uncomfortable, I like the window seat with extra leg room so I most likely will not give up my seat. Families should not ask passengers when they get on the plane, ask the gate beforehand.
I believe children are not allowed to be seated in exit row seats in Australia.
100 dollar bills work wonders…don’t have one? Better hope it’s cause you paid for seats together…do not bother me because I will not be bothering you or anyone else while I am traveling…you had the right to leave your house intentionally and now you want to act surprised at how the real world works? You just look stupid in front of your kids…get over it. And leave people alone
Wow people – it’s like folks forget what’s it’s like to travel.
I am ALL about planning ahead. And we have 4 kids. I do NOT try to cheap out. I book way ahead to get seats together and pay extra if I need to.
HOWEVER, what about missed connections and then the family gets scattered across 6 different aisles? I do not think it is too much to ask for help for someone to sit next to my youngest child. The teens can handle themselves in a middle seat or wherever but it’s common decency to at least TRY to help the youngest travelers. OMG why does everyone assume that everyone looking to swap seats was just being cheap? Heck, they could have even paid for upgraded seats and been screwed out of them because of a missed connection which is the fault of the airline. How about having an iota of compassion?
Quite honestly, the complaining flight attendant sounds entitled and lazy. As does the other commenter here who says they were a flight attendant for 35 years and didn’t like to help families. It is employees like you that make flying a miserable experience.
Some common decency would be nice.
@kcwpg:
Your general thoughts are correct, but it is an airline problem that some are trying to impose on other passengers.
Flight attendants can ASK other passengers to move, but they are trying to deescalate problems on board, not exacerbate them.
The key is that reservation agents should be blocking seats and moving people behind the scenes–not on board the aircraft or at the gate.
The problem becomes how do you handle someone who booked in advance and is being moved involuntarily from their assigned seats.
The only real answer is to leave a block of unassigned seats for gate assignment, which the airlines don’t want to do. They are trying to decrease gate agent needs, not increase it.
There is no easy answer.
Just to let it be known, that we ( a family of four including twin daughters that are 8) book our seats together frequently to be separated from each other and our children and we are told that we will need to ask people to switch to be seated near our children. If they are able to change our seats, the staff usually acts as though they are accommodating us and going out of their way. Make no mistake, I love my children more than life itself but I’m ok if you think it is safe and appropriate to place my children next to someone else… just make sure they are willing and capable to help in case of emergencies and possibly opening drinks, snacks, etc… oh yes, and one usually gets sick at the end of the flight so, for the love of everything in this world , try to have at least one emesis bag in the entire row:)
I’ve travelled for business work extensively, and try to sit in aisle seats for specific reasons. Circulation (to prevent clots) and the possible need to disembark to race (yes, literally) to a connecting flight. I’ve experienced all kinds of requests over the years. Most are reasonable, and if I have no constraints, I try to help. I have had unreasonable requests though, and occasionally they have been contentious. The worst are preboarders who take your assigned seat, and when claim its theirs when you board. On one occasion I thought I was going to be kicked off a flight because one refused to take their assigned seat. If you ever do much routine travel, you will see every kind of behavior. Rarely, but once in a while, it is extremely rude.
Last year on a trip from Atlanta to Greece, I did not get a single seat I paid for. First flight a young man was in my window seat. When I told him he shrugged and said “I’m already seated. I sat. Middle of course. For 10 hours. Next, the check in moved me, you guessed it. A family. I sat for hours in a middle seat with a gentleman who read for 10 hours with the overhead light on. Why not pitch a fit? I would end up the crazy southern lady on youtube. Being someone who has traveled a lot for work and pleasure it is getting worse. I would not want to be traveling weekly as I once did.
On a recent trip to California with my daughter, we had to request to have our seats reassigned. We had booked our flights months prior and had assigned seats together. At the airport, they had changed our seats without our knowledge and were no longer sitting together. I noticed the change before we went through security and the counter agent kindly worked his magic to get our seats together again. So while I’m sure there’s a lot of behind-the-scenes requests for changes, other passengers who have paid for certain seats together are being affected as well.
If I paid extra for MCE or premium economy, no way am I surrendering that seat.
I have permanent hip and shoulder injuries, and have learned to book Economy+, or even the rare First Class splurge. Because then, the airlines are less likely to rearrange you on a whim. And they will rearrange you on a whim if you haven’t paid out for something premium.
My husband used to travel for business and was Platinum level at the time. For a personal trip we booked economy seats but still chose our seat assignments. We checked in 24-hours ahead of time, and we had the seat assignments we’d booked with, all good. When we got to the airport I was having a bad joint day, so we decided to just check our bags since free luggage was a perk of his Platinum status. So we go to the counter, and the counter agent says, “Oh, you need new boarding passes.” We were confused, and she ended up giving us new seats – my husband retained his window, I retained my aisle, but we were now several rows apart and many rows back from the front. (Yes, we sit with a middle between us – we don’t talk over the person in the middle because that’s rude. But my husband loves to look out the window and I can’t do the middle with my joints, so we just settle in and act like strangers.)
There was no equipment change or anything – the seats we had checked in with and that still showed up on the boarding passes in our Delta apps were just no longer ours. We got no explanation for it from any Delta staff and they refused to engage with us – no apology or anything. We ultimately just took the new seat assignments – it was a 2 hour flight, we are not the kind of couple joined at the hip anyway, so it wasn’t a huge deal, but we were just totally mystified.
Once we boarded and walked past our originally assigned row? There was a group of people sitting in our seats saying, “See? I told you if we bugged the gate agent enough they’d let us all sit together!” And there weren’t even kids involved! I wondered if they had just parked themselves in front of the check-in desk and refused to move until a gate agent got fed up and reassigned the couple who clearly didn’t need to sit directly next to each other.
So if that’s how they treat tickets booked by a Platinum status customer, why on earth does anyone think that a family may not have actually booked together in Economy, but somewhere along the way, their reservation got hosed? It’s why I don’t assume these families didn’t plan ahead – I mean, some clearly don’t, but you can book tickets together and then have your seat assignments disappear between booking and check-in. (I have been known to log in and check a reservation periodically before a flight to make sure our seating assignments still stand.)
This isn’t to say I’ll give up my seat – when I was flying solo, I did it once for a woman who swore up and down she had an aisle further back and she needed to sit with her child. Nope, I ended up in a middle seat between two huge shouldered men…and she ended up walking a toddler up and down the aisle the whole time so the tween aged child she’d begged to sit with was clearly fine on their own. I hobbled off that flight in a lot of pain, and swore never to do that again.
Flying is just a nightmare from top to bottom these days.
This is a cultural blemish on our collective face. It doesn’t just happen on aircraft but in multiple other venues as well, including dinner parties in private homes. Let me be clear: Unless you have a very, very good reason (tiny child, medical needs) for being unwilling to sit more than 3 feet away from your spouse or kid for two hours, stop it. You are together all the time; quit pressuring single people to sacrifice for you because you believe your preferences automatically matter more than theirs. It makes us feel like second-class citizens.
Book your traveling seats together, arrive early to the gathering, etc. But don’t expect someone else to move just because “we’re a family, and we wanna sit together.” Respect. Talk to others once in awhile. It’s healthy.