A mother flying business class with her nine-month-old says her seatmate snapped after just two minutes of crying — even urging the crew to downgrade her to economy. The confrontation reignites which travelers actually belong in premium cabins, and what can parents reasonably do to keep flights calm for everyone on board?
A woman flying New York to Zurich overnight with her 9-month-old baby used points to upgrade to business class and looked forward to both of them sleeping. She thought that would reduce the impact on passengers around her. And she came prepared: bottles prepped, toys, and a plan to keep the baby quiet.
There were also several other babies and young children in the cabin, which made her feel better. She wasn’t the only one ‘disturbing’ passengers around her.
However, a woman arrived at at the seat beside her, saw the baby, and exclaimed:
Are you kidding me?
The flight takes off. The baby sleeps for about three hours. Then the baby wakes up hungry, cries for roughly two minutes while mom is getting a bottle together. That’s when the seatmate “Flies up,” gives the mom the finger, marches to the galley and loudly tells the flight attendants the mom and baby need to be “put in economy.” When she returns to her seat, she tells the mom:
Babies don’t belong in business class. If you can’t ‘control your infant’ you shouldn’t be here.
The mom replies that she’s doing her best and the woman can, “with all due respect, f- off, and if she didn’t want the roulette of who she sat next to on a commercial flight she could fly her a– private.” After that, the seatmate puts on headphones and doesn’t speak to her for the rest of the flight.
Flight attendants backed the mom up. They reportedly tell the angry passenger it’s a public plane, anyone who pays for a seat is entitled to sit there, and there are babies in first class as well.
After the trip, the mom tells her mother-in-law, who actually agreed with the hostile passenger – babies shouldn’t be in business class, and that it’s an “unspoken rule” that if you’re flying with a child, you should fly economy. The mother-in-law is wrong.
- if you bought/paid for the seat (cash or points), you belong there, baby or not.
- there are plenty of misbehaving adults and well-behaved kids
- kids disturing passengers in economy isn’t actually better
- you can’t demand someone be “put in economy” because you don’t like their age/noise potential
There’s a lot a parent can do to minimize noise. In this case the baby wasn’t completely silent the whole flight, but it sounds like things went pretty well overall. My daughter used to go 15 hours without a peep at six months old. My son takes a lot more work. Here are the 13 key elements of our approach to travel with young kids:
- Know the newborn vs infant sweet spot. Newborns are easy if you stay ahead of needs: sleep, feed, change, move them when they’re uncomfortable.
The sweet spot for long-haul is roughly 3 – 9 months, when they still sleep a ton and aren’t trying to climb everywhere yet.
- Feed fast, on-demand. Be ready to feed immediately when they start to fuss, especially on takeoff/early in the flight.
If bottle-feeding, have bottles prepped and use the baby liquid exemption to bring all the water you actually need through security so you’re not scrambling onboard, or collect the water from a flight attendant in advance.
- Pack more activities than you think you need. For toddlers, assume very short attention spans and plan to keep switching activities: small toys, books, simple games. The job is constant rotation so they never get to the bored phase.
- Snacks are your second line of defense. Don’t rely on the airline’s catering. Bring lots of familiar, easy snacks and be comfortable basically using them as bribes to keep up blood sugar and mood level.
- Buy space when you can. Business class is actually good here. Use miles and cash offers to get more space, or consider an extra seat. Space means less climbing over other people, easier movement, and more room to entertain the kid.
- Proactively choose the right seats. Prioritize bulkheads/bassinet positions on long-haul when available. Make absolutely sure you’re seated together, and for many kids, give them the window so they’re not trying to crawl across strangers to see out.
- Time flights around their sleep, not yours. Aim to take off near bedtime so the plane’s white noise works in your favor. For short-haul, fly midday. Avoid brutal early-morning or very late flights that blow up their sleep schedule and trigger meltdowns.
- Break up big trips. I deliberately overnighted on trips to Bora Bora, Australia, and Europe with a baby. Even Hawaii! Grabbing a hotel room rather than pushing them through two long flights keeps them fresh and functional and reduces the chance of a midjourney meltdown.
- Recreate the bedtime routine on the plane. Treat the cabin like home, with pajamas and teeth brushing in the lav, then the same books and stories sequence you use at home so they recognize “oh, now it’s sleep time.”
- Unlimited tablet time. This may be controversial to some but flights are loved because normal screen time rules don’t apply. Don’t rely on the wifi. Preload age-appropriate contents in advance. Age-appropriate headphones are a must.
- Use movement strategically. When it’s allowed, walk the aisles with them, change their environment, and even play with them in the lav for a bit to break up the monotony.
- Visibly parent when things go wrong. Other passengers mostly get it if a baby cries, as long as you’re obviously trying: feeding, walking, soothing, rotating toys, adjusting seats, etc.
What sets people off is parents who check out and stop responding while everyone else takes the noise. So err on the side of active, even “performative,” effort so people see you working the problem.
- Assume crying has a cause, and think through responses in advance. Crying means hunger, fatigue, discomfort, pressure, boredom. “If it’s X, I try A/B/C; if that fails, I move, feed, walk, or reset.” That way you’re not improvising in panic at 35,000 feet.
Business class isn’t a child-free zone, and two minutes of fussing isn’t a crisis. The real question isn’t whether babies belong up front, but whether the adults around them can manage the occasional reality of shared travel. But it’s still incumbent on parents to… parent, as best they can under the circumstances.
I’m fairly sure that Air Canada prohibited me from flying with an infant in lie-flat business class. This was for safety.
Obviously the woman overreacted and behaved poorly. But I honestly do not understand why small children are allowed in business class. Please spare me the “you’re not on a private jet”. Like yes of course you’re not, but a screaming child can honestly ruin the experience for those seated in the vicinity. In some configurations (eg Virgin’s 789s) a screaming child can be heard quite literally throughout the cabin.
Many luxury hotels restrict the ability of small children to stay, and I honestly do not understand why more airlines don’t as well. Or, at a bare minimum, restrict certain seats in the very back or front of the plane for small kids & their parents, so that the rest of us can plan accordingly.
I wish parents would not bring a baby into Business Class, specifically on an overnight flight. My parents’ generation would either not done so or take precautions such as having toys/items to prevent long bouts of crying. But of course, in 2025 you should be subject to whatever discomforts the parents must endure.
That being said, I would never take action to try to get someone sent back to coach. Sometimes flying sucks and having a screaming baby goes with the program. Don’t like it? Stay at home or drive.
I’m increasingly of the opinion that, like pets, babies and small children don’t belong on aircraft at all. For their sake, and that of the flying public.
It’s not crying babies that are a problem, it’s the adult crybabies
Given the fact that many people take the business class cabin so that they can arrive refreshed at their destination, ready to hit the ground, running for whatever business or meetings they might have planned for the next day. Having a sleep ruined in the middle of the night by a crying baby is a massive said back in that plan. So I can understand somebody really getting annoyed.
The mom is an entitled b. Control your kid, be proactive, and noone will have an issue with you.
It has been years ago.
My son was a just starting to walk and active. We were on a 747 in front with the upper deck all lounge and piano.
FA offered us the entire lounge for a hour to try and wear him out. Rest of the cabin thought that was a good trade as well.
And yes most everyone was dressed up.
Ohh- I have a better suggestion- we should reserve the front of the plane for parents and babies, and relegate the entitled Karens to the back. That way, people who need the space have more, and the the grumblers have company in the back…
My parents flew with me all the time when I was a baby, and I did with my kids as well. That’s typically what you have to do when you’re expats. Kids over 2 were paid business class for home leave, back in the good old days. Nice thing is SQ never gave free upgrades to business class, and didn’t used to allow people to use points, so plenty of room to spread out. Ah, the good old days when they excluded the grumbling point-using riff raff!
@George: I am in complete agreement. Typical Americans that feel entitled to Biz Class because the work they do makes the world go round.
Take some metamucil Alan, it will help clear your brain.
Maybe we should ban flushing the toilet in business class also, so as not to disrupt the otherwise quiet environment for these special passengers. While we’re at it, we could also ask the plane to fly a little bit quieter?
Years ago, my ex-wife was traveling Polaris with our kids, then 6 and 2. Upon boarding, she said a middle-aged male began loudly exclaiming: “Oh my god, kids in business class! This is ridiculous! Our flight is going to be ruined!” She said he carried on like this at high volume for another few sentences. She shut him up by saying: “We paid for these seats and have as much right as you to be here, and honestly, you’re being a lot more disruptive to the cabin right now than my kids.” LOL
I have a bigger issue with the child being on a lap rather than having its own seat. Why that is allowed makes no sense. Airlines want 200-lb adults buckled in for safety but will let a 10-lb infant serve as an airborn projectile. Parents are required to put children in car seats, it should be the same in aircraft.
As for babies crying, I’ll be sympathetic to the complaining adult when they can prove to me that they have never annoyed anyone around them in their life.
I’ve been in business and first class when the passenger in front of me hocked up a lung the entire flight They would then call flight attendants and complain about the fact that there wasn’t a smoking section…Multiple times. The guy must have been 70 as well. Can we exclude Seniors from Business and First?
There are parents who do their best to keep their kids under control. There are parents who ignore it and let their kids run amok. 2 mins while a parent is trying to heat a bottle…Get a grip.
There are no judges, juries or executioners on planes.
It’s not about business or economy but why trying to travel with babies or kids. I understand there are times in our lives where babies and kids need to fly but more often than not it’s the adults who WANTS to fly, travel, vacation etc. and bring the kids along. If you have kids and babies, your lives evolves around them and limit your freedom or seek other alternatives.
So, the poor people in economy should have to put up with babies crying but the “special” people in business class shouldn’t? Wow. Do you guys hear yourselves?
This is why i like KLM most of their planes have designated section for those flying with kids.
I’m glad the mother gave feedback to the sour attitude. Almost anyone can put in earplugs and not hear most of the crying of the baby. Maybe a blog post on which noise canceling earphones and headphones work the best on airplanes is something that could be revisited.
@chris
I guess it makes sense why she’s your ex-wife then
Agree with the sweet spot re kids ages to fly. Often had to laugh at friends who were waiting for their baby to be a “bit older to fly”. Under 9 months a great age to travel with kids. We rarely took long haul flights from 1-3yo.
Also for that age if you have to fly then an extra seat in economy with a car seat strapped in is the greatest piece of advice we could give. Way better than first domestically or business class. Kids far more comfortable strapped in than roaming about in the seat. They sleep wayyyy better too.
It always amazes me that frequent flyers posting here to complain about crying babies do not come prepared for the possibility there will be a baby on their flight. If your rest/sleep is so important, isn’t this what noise cancelling headphones and ear plugs are for? I bring them for any flight when I am counting on sleep, and when there’s been a crying baby or obnoxiously loud adult I have never had a problem. Isn’t the frequent flyer community supposed to have the expertise from experience to anticipate things like this?
Business class pax are special – they work on cooler stuff, have more money, privilege etc. so I’m sure they can afford noise cancelling headphones. So, they should bear the sound of crying children and misbehaving adults. 🙂
Ah, the sequel to ‘dogs on planes’ is indeed ‘babies on planes’… isn’t it time for a ‘people wearing an offensive shirt/hat on planes’ story or another round of ‘Clean. Your. Planes.’ so I can say: ‘Properly hire, train, pay, and support your cleaners’ yet again?
I’m never rude, and a few minutes of crying is no big deal anyway. However I agree that crying babies really don’t belong there. People buy business class to sleep, and it is difficult to sleep with noise canceling headphones on. (Again, for short periods but not for hours.) And your argument that there are unruly adults doesn’t hold water in my experience. In dozens of flights I have never had an unruly adult in business class.
Your nice long list is missing one key way to avoid your baby crying: take road trips until they are old enough. There is nothing at all you can do to control a baby. We flew a lot once our daughter was about five years old.
If you can tell me a set of noise cancelling headphones that work on children and their entitled parents, please let me know. There is no price too high. Don’t make us also pay for your life choices when we already paid for the seats.
Why do parents continue to bring poorly behaved children with them? No one, including a baby, should be crying or yelling for any length of time. It ruins everyone’s journey, including the parent’s. Leave the kid home with a sitter until they are able to control their actions. (This goes for poorly behaved adults, too)
Team Mom 100%. Families with infants should be able to travel in style as well. RAPHAEL, air canada was wrong then – there’s no good safety argument against babies in lie-flat business (another example of a vague “safety” reason given that isn’t justified). SAM, you’re wrong – families with infants have just as much a right to be in business class as anyone else. GEORGE ROMEY, personal preference, fair enough. DENVER REFUGEE, happy you’re not empowered to enforce your incorrect opinion. MAUREEN is right. BBT, if people can afford business class, they can afford noise canceling headphones – problem solved. ALAN, you’re full of it – control yourself. DOUG, nice story. GEORGE, agreed – it’s hard enough for parents to travel with children. RAY, right on. CHEEZWHIZ, amen to that. JAMES, lol. CHRIS, your story makes a good point. DANG, fair. HENRY, erm, ok, not really our business to police why people with children travel. PAUL, yes, that’s what the classist whiners are saying. JNS, amen to that.
There’s always one on every flight now. Please wait to see granny when the child’s inner ears are more developed! They can’t clear the pressure changes.
Hey George, one better. How about just a baby flight so they can all enjoy the little bundles! Maybe get an idea of what it’s like. I would never impose a baby on anyone. They cannot cope.
I really like how Delta reserved the last 3 rows or so for families with children. Such a win win.
Idiot Sam really said a crying baby ruins the business class experience. So the economy passengers deserve that experience lol. The entitlement of some of you. Someone else said keep your “poor behaved children” home till they are well behaved like nothing can’t upset a toddler flying in a tube. You want the parents to prep for their kids, how about you also prep for the chance a crying child is seated next to you goofball
Yeah! No babies in business class! Put them in first class instead! Now everyone’s thinking!
Babies don’t belong in business or first class. You’re paying – in cash or miles – for extra space, peace and quiet, higher quality food and drink, and more personalized service. Until a child is old enough to describe problems with at least a little accuracy, more-or-less feed themselves, and handle going to the potty unaided then they don’t belong in premium cabins.
Some people with attempt a ridiculous equivalence by saying that some adults behave badly on planes too but that ignores that a baby screaming its lungs out for hours is simply not capable of explaining exactly what’s wrong while even with royal jerks on planes you can often understand their problem even if you disagree with that problem so it’s not even close to the same thing.
So many anti- kid and anti-parent selfish folks on this thread. Can you really listen to yourselves? No wonder the country is going to the dogs! Be kind people! And fly private if you don’t want company.
So it is ok to subject someone who doesn’t have unlimited financial means to something that you wouldn’t require of someone who is wealthy? New flash, those miles have the same value as your dollars when used to upgrade. The Bitch seatmate can pound sand. I do agree that the parent should be prepared to minimize the affects that a child has on the cabin whether it is in the front of the plane or the last row.
In 2006 we were fortunate to purchase United’s $1000 RT mistake fare to NZ. We did not purchase a 3rd seat for our infant as we figured to take him as a lap child.
On our SFO-SYD overnight segment, he woke up hungry and began to cry. While I was fetching warm milk from galley, a Karen decided to tell Mrs. B that we didn’t belong in the biz cabin. When I returned, I asked Karen if she was an upgrader, and told her we were flying on paid tickets so she could shove her opinions up her *** and talk to me if she had anything further to say. Of course she did not.
IMO the key is reponsible parenting. If your baby cries you are expected to make an effort to calm them, whether it be walking the cabin, feeding, whatever. Parents who ignore the crying deserve to be chewed out. The others deserve a break.
having had any time traveling in Business with a loud snoring person? Did one ever directly complain to that person, possibly by saying the cause is because that person has an overweight problem and/or ate/drank too much? I mean, come on: it is not a private jet! This shouldn’t implicate we must excuse uneducated children (and mostly their partents!). The parents are even worse, often, not to mention one really should have some thoughts whether at all kids should be at all taken into First or Business, from an educational point of view. Surely there is no need to do so for a teenager! But what do you do with toddlers/babies: of course you must take them with you, whatever class you chose flying in. Everybody should make an effort to keep it civilised and a crying of a baby for a couple of minutes is perfectly ok.
My parents wouldn’t let us fly until we were old enough to behave. I guess putting the needs of 200+ others over your own selfish wants to travel with an infant sounds old fashioned. I can’t expect someone next to me on a plane to not be a completely insane sociopath, let alone be an insufferable narcissist that doesn’t mind inconveniencing hundreds of others. Don’t tell me sometimes it’s necessary. Yeah, 1% of the time it’s a mother and baby going to a funeral or visiting dying family, the rest of the time it’s pure selfishness.
All infants should be in approved car seats…required for a trip from home to the local store, should be required for a trip from JFK to ZUR. Additionally Business Class seat should sell for a specific price regardless of the age of the occupant. Maybe if the airlines would charge those traveling with children full fares then they could take out some seats in Economy and make it more comfortable for EVERYONE.
People saying that families with kids shouldn’t travel are out of control. Kids are humans that deserve to be in public spaces or see the world just like the rest of us. Calling them selfish for traveling is quite selfish of you – if they have the means to travel, you don’t get to dictate how they live their lives. This is also about teaching children how to behave in the world. Most parents are going to make an attempt to soothe their children and are more upset than you are by their crying. It costs zero dollars to be empathetic and grateful you’re not in their shoes.
I don’t have kids but if I did and wanted to travel business with my baby, I would. I would try minimize the impact, but I couldn’t care less about people’s opinion. If the airline and flight attendants don’t have an issue, then mind your own business.
It’s pretty funny. Half the time on an airplane people scream “I paid for it so I deserve it” and the other half say “you’re entitled”.
Regardless, if you’re the one who can’t stand the environment, why didn’t she go back to economy where it was quieter? If her argument is “I paid for it”, that applies to the other person too.
Unless we’re heading to a “caste system” where you are treated differently just because of who you are.
So much for democracy and equality.
Children DO NOT belong in BUSINESS. It’s called BUSINESS for a reason. First class is an entirelly different topic, but I personally think that if I managed the airline, I certainly wouldn’t allow children in either of them. As a customer, if I paid a buttload of money to have a premium experience and you let a toddler (or more) ruin it for me, you can bet next time I’m flying economy. Why bother paying extra?! And yes, a loud snorer should be removed for the same reason. For both first and business class, QUIET is one of the incentives to buy the premium. If you know you have a little “problem” that could ruin that for everyone there, have the courtesy to not do so. No, those paying more for the quiet are not entitled a.h., YOU are for not respecting that.