Star Alliance frequent flyer program Avianca LifeMiles has a new promotion running through April for you to sign up for their co-brand credit credit card.

And it’s everything customers hate about marketing, and fine print.

Triple miles could be exciting, right? In fact, it’s your ticket to paradise!

With triple miles you can even plan the getaway of a lifetime.

In addition to the standard signup bonus of 20,000 miles with first use, you’ll earn triple miles on all of your purchases for the first 45 days as a cardmember… “up to a total of $1,000.”

Put another way, this offer gives you the opportunity to earn an extra 2000 miles which is apparently your ticket to paradise. If LifeMiles offered bus service redemptions to Paradise Valley, Arizona. And if your life were especially boring, so that would be the best getaway of your whole life.

What’s more, since the card is from US Bank they warn that you might apply and get approved for a different product altogether. In fact, there’s an entire decision tree for what card you might get.

We will first consider you for the LifeMiles Visa Signature Card. If you do not qualify you will automatically be considered for the LifeMiles Visa Card which qualifies for the low introductory offer but does not include the LifeMiles Visa Signature benefits. If you are not eligible for the LifeMiles Visa Card, you will be considered for the LifeMiles Visa Secured Card. The LifeMiles Visa Secured Card does not qualify for the low introductory offer and it does not receive the LifeMiles Visa Signature benefits. The LifeMiles Visa Secured Card requires a minimum deposit of $300 provided by the cardmember that will be held in a security deposit account. Full details of the Secured card will be provided upon qualified status.