A woman decided she wanted to make her opponent in the middle seat just as uncomfortable as he’d made her. The man had been sending racist texts, and she not only saw him doing it, she caught his text stream on video. Should she have been looking at his phone in the first place?
The passengers were flying Delta Air Lines from San Juan to Atlanta, and halfway through the flight she confronted man who had been messaging about her and about her family. He complained that he had to sit “near Black and queer people” when he flew and wouldn’t it be so much better if airlines raised ticket prices to “weed out” such people through unaffordability?
She said to him: “I want you to know that I saw your text messages, and I think you’re disgusting.” He acted oblivious, “What text messages?”
After she replied, “I want you to know that I know. I saw you, and I think that you’re disgusting” she met his silence with, “Maybe if they raise prices, maybe you wouldn’t be able to afford to sit with your family, that way they don’t have to sit next to black people. He apologized, but she wasn’t having it, “You’re sorry because I saw it.”
When you see something happen, you’re not okay with it, and always wish you’d stood up, stood strong, and had just the words to shut up your opponent into silent submission? This woman did that. And he had two hours to sit there, just sit there, and know he’d been made small – by precisely the woman he’d thought was somehow less than he was.
@taila.thecreator Sitting next to a racist on my four hour flight from Puerto Rico to Atlanta this week. Yes I could’ve minded my own business, but why should I let him slide? I happened to glance over and see the words “big black woman” so I continued reading. He and his family went on and on about the woes of being stuck sitting next to Black and gay people. Then I see this man say he hopes airlines continue to raise prices so these people get weeded out. If you’re gonna be bold enough to pull your phone out in the middle seat of an airplane and freely talk disrespectfully about Black people, then I’m going to be bold enough to say something to you. What would you have done? #traveltiktok #racistoftheday #racistencounter #airplanedrama #travelingwhileblack #blacktravelfeed ♬ original sound – Taila • Travel Tips
@taila.thecreator Replying to @TXSM9999 ♬ original sound – Taila • Travel Tips
@taila.thecreator Replying to @mamamimi1976 He wouldn’t even think in my direction when the plane landed. #racistsinthewild #airplaneencounters #blacktravelers #embarrassed ♬ original sound – Taila • Travel Tips
There’s an apocryphal story that’s made rounds on the internet since at least the late 1990s about a racist passenger complaining about being seated next to someone they deemed undesirable and demanding a flight attendant do something about it.
A 50-something year old white woman arrived at her seat on a crowded flight and immediately didn’t want the seat. The seat was next to a black man. Disgusted, the woman immediately summoned the flight attendant and demanded a new seat.
The woman said, “I cannot sit here next to this black man.”
The fight attendant said, “Let me see if I can find another seat.”
After checking, the flight attendant returned and stated “Ma’am, there are no more seats in economy, but I will check with the captain and see if there is something in first class.”
About 10 minutes went by and the flight attendant returned and stated “The captain has confirmed that there are no more seats in economy, but there is one in first class. It is our company policy to never move a person from economy to first class, but being that it would be some sort of scandal to force a person to sit next to an UNPLEASANT person, the captain agreed to make the switch to first class.”
Before the woman could say anything, the attendant gestured to the black man and said, “Therefore sir, if you would so kindly retrieve your personal items, we would like to move you to the comfort of first class as the captain doesn’t want you to sit next to an unpleasant person.”
This story was even turned into a public service advertisement in Portugal.
Is it too much to wish that this woman had been upgraded? It’s too late to give her an upgrade on her San Juan – Atlanta flight, but Delta could reach out and confirm an upgrade for her the next time she flies.
And to everyone else, beware that your screen is visible to the person sitting next to you. We like to pretend that no one is around us when we’re forced to be in the middle of crowds, but that isn’t true, and aircraft seats really aren’t zones of privacy.
Lots of people are mindless bigots. But lots of people are not seriously STUPID bigots … texting nasty stuff from a seat in coach where anyone can read your texts? I feel sorry for anyone who has to go through life without a working brain.
I started out thinking she has no business looking at his phone……but given that he was texting about her, she was 100% correct to challenge him
This site has really deteriorated lately. Just after click traffic now, stoking emotionally fueled BS now over a disgusting event…. Middle seat guy is a repugnant person, check…. Seat mate needs to not be reading middle seat’s messages and not confront said repugnance in that environment, let alone feel the need to film confrontation ffs.. Sit down down in ur seat, act like a polite human being and keep ur opinions to yourself for a few hours, get off the plane and go about ur life never seeing this person ever again! SMH!
A great MASH episode addressing bigotry.
Imagine if we acknowledged air travel is pretty terrible these days.
Imagine acknowledging maybe diversity makes this worse because we have different cultural frameworks for navigating the experience.
Imagine acknowledging some cultures seem to be lot more violent in public settings.
No, let’s instead confirm the stereotype about it being terrible for someone like him to run into someone like her.
In the end, she proved him … right.
@ Gary — While seated in F and watching people board our flight last night, a white woman turned around and yelled at a black woman behind her “don’t you to touch my bag again.” I was a bit surprised when I looked up and noticed that the black woman was nowhere near the white woman or her bag. I asked my traveling companion “did that woman just say what I think she did?” Before he could answer, the rude woman said “yes, I said don’t touch my bag again”. I responded by telling her “You are rude.” Of course, her reply to me was “You are rude.” I stopped to apologize to the black woman for the way she was being treated and her response was “I don’t speak English!”. Ha! on the rude, racist woman. Her victim didn’t even understand her.
This was a really good article. Though I have to admit, I like the airport/airplane fight stories even more. Always been a closet “Springer” fan…
Gene, please stop trying to get social points for being the behavior police.
As for the black woman, you do realize they are people with agency like you and I, right? She doesn’t need a creepy old man running defense for her. You won’t get laid by doing that, although you sure are trying.
I love this woman for calling him out!
@Loretta Jackson
Exactly what I was thinking. The guy is an idiot. But the woman confirmed the very misinformed stereotype she was offended by being compartmentalized as. Being a bigot, sad. Invading someone’s private – (yes, private – because is is NOT a public screen, and one has the expectation of privacy on your own phone screen l, even on a plane) – conversations, well – that’s invasion of privacy. And it trumps someone’s RIGHT to be a misinformed bigot.
The MAGA hat would’ve been the first clue
That story about being bumped to F happened to me in the mid-1990’s! I was in my late teens flying ORD-STN on AA and was seated next to an older woman who sat next to me and then got up to talk to an FA. I had my headphones on and had no idea what was going on but the FA tapped me on the shoulder and told me to grab my carryon. I did and was upgraded to an empty C. One by one, every FA came up to me and apologized for the other passengers behavior. Only then did I realize what happened.
Bad things happen, often later on, to eyes that pry people into someone else’s business. Like an icepick.
@ Loretta Jackson — WTH are you talking about? I’m not creedy, old or looking to get laid by a stranger. OTOH, you sound creepy, old and looking to get laid by anyone who breathes.
Keep your nose out of other people’s private communication.
Period.
@ SosongBlue, if you feel that “the site has really deteriorated” you are welcome to ask for a refund.
@Patti – yes indeed. Now Apple when will they release a screen mode that’s ‘private’ mode and can’t be seen at angles. In the meantime there are privacy screen attachments for phones and laptops.
I wonder what the law is of recording without two party consent in the air (i think there are state level laws) – and is a plane really a public place given the requirement to buy a ticket and no general public ability to board the aircraft without one?
@ Patti @ Greg — A screen that can be openly viewed is absolutely not private, and I guarantee you there is no law agianst filming it. People really should do a better job if they want to hide their racism.
@Patti if said “private” communication involved exploitation of children or threats of violence to someone or to the flight would you feel the same? An airplane is not a private space. If you are doing something on the plane (including messaging) you cannot assume what you are doing is not going to be seen by others. That’s just an unrealistic expectation when you are cramming dozens and dozen of people in an aluminum tube that’s about 12 feet wide.
@SOBE ER, your whataboutism is the product of a lazy mind. Do better
Nobody, NOBODY has the right to look over my shoulder and read my communication.
And if I catch someone doing it, then after I chew their snooping asses out and publically embarrass them, I’ll be glad to post on social media about what a snooping busybody I have next to me.
A plane may not be considered a “private” place but what I write or text is none of anyone else’s business.
@ Patti — I’ve got bad news for you, they have EVERY right to look over your shoulder in public. Public does not equal private. You cannot have it both ways. Stay in your home if you want privacy, especially while you are being a racist.
@Patti, rather than focusing on the substance of my question…which calls into question your logic, you accuse me of “whataboutism” to deflect from the fact that you are wrong. If I see someone looking at images that are exploiting children you damn well better believe that I’m alerting the flight attendant AND calling 911 to report the person. If someone is watching porn on their phone or laptop on a plane I am going to ask them to stop and save that for a more appropriate location.
You are the one who needs to do better. Not everything is as black and white as you seem to see it.
When one is in public there is NO expectation of privacy. I hope you are not so naive as to believe otherwise. Every time one steps outside they are on security cameras, their phone tracks their movements, apps track location and key strokes. Using a work phone or laptop? Your company has the legal right to watch everything you do on that device…even watch you on the camera, if they want to. If you don’t want someone looking over your shoulder then don’t do whatever it is you don’t want them looking at in public.
People who seem to think they can do whatever they want in public and behave in any way they want don’t seem to understand that there are socially acceptable norms that include not doing inappropriate things in public. Texting racist comments when others can see them certainly seems inappropriate to me. And while this person is entitled to their racist beliefs, others are entitled to call him out on them.
While I certainly don’t condone racism the woman had no business reading her seat mates texts. Mind your own business.
@Gene and SOBE
Don’t quit your day jobs because your understanding of the law is REALLY BAD.
If you are reading their communication without their permission, it is an invasion of privacy regardless of location.
@Patti absolutely correct! The idea that in public, you have no privacy, is an oversimplification.
I am a Harvard Law graduate and former partner at Cravath.
@ Patti — Did you get your law degree from FoxNews University?
I always revert to: “It’s @Gary’s blog and he may post what he likes.”
That said, I don’t know why he posts stuff like this. It sure as sh*t doesn’t sell credit cards.
On the content of the story: Whatever happened to minding your own business? Were it not for Antisocial media, I imagine we would would be spared a lot of this crap, but the “Look at me, everyone” factor just over-rules everything.
In addition to his disgusting texts, she should have also called him out for his disgusting unkempt nails.
Always love people standing up for the rights of racists using false equivalences.
@Not Lucky
No one is standing up for the rights of racists. But trapped on a plane is not the time to confront someone for a racist comment u see while spying on their texts. It’s air travel ffs, half the people on the airplane we would probably never get along with as it is racist or not, so sit down, shut up, play nice and in a few hours you never see these people ever again….. let’s go back to yelling and berating over masks and vaccines.
Alison says “I am a Harvard Law graduate and former partner at Cravath.”
It must be true.
@ Not Lucky Patti — Racists need to be exposed and called out on the spot, exactly as was done in this case.
SosongBlue. Wear a MAGA hat. You might get a toilet seat on tRUMP’s gold-plated (taxpayer-funded) lady in the sky.
Gene,
Should they be dragged in the street too? Don’t let other people’s hate spread fuel hate in yourself. Be very careful of what you advocate when everything and everyone is liable of being accused as racist these days, You’ll probably label me as racist for my comment just for having a different point of view on. The mob is strong these days and full of just as much hate as those they hate. Try being better.
@ AFairTexan
Sorry to disappoint, I detest Trump, I’m just a minority libertarian that’s actually still sane… but you go on with your assumptions. By your post everyone can see you are just as hateful as any racist bigot. We don’t need people like you on our side virtue signaling for us on an anonymous forum let alone in real life, it’s embarrassing. You are a liability and no smart well meaning person regardless of politics would want you as an ally because you are a liability and can’t even state a reasoned opinion or argument. Sad
Free upgrade. This will become a common complaint, whether true or not. Some may even game the system.