Yesterday morning a United gate agent in Atlanta ‘sounds like a coach’ giving a pregame speech commends his team passengers for making it to the plane on time. “You’re here, you’re on time. I’m commending you for it. I’m high-fiving you for it,” he says.

But he warns everyone, they may be tempted to go get breakfast at the nearby bagel place. “Goldberg’s have lethargic lines,” he says. “They don’t move as quick as they should this time of the morning.”

He recalls two days ago someone missing their flight “over a bagel.” So “if you’re one of those who wants to step away and get a bagel, fine. If you don’t have your bagel by 5.40, come to the gate and board.”

After all — “they got bagels in Newark” where the flight was headed. And he leaves it unsaid that the bagels there are going to be better.

He does say that the door will be closed — for a 6:00 a.m. flight — at 5:40. United requires passengers to be onboard a domestic flight 15 minutes prior to departure, and the gate agent quickly corrects himself with 5:45.

Here’s our hero, dropping a little wisdom on passengers who may not be familiar with the airline’s push for “D0” or pushing back exactly on time.

Outstanding speech this morning by United guy Kevin in Atlanta. His “What side of the door will you be on?” line sounds like a coach’s pregame speech. pic.twitter.com/eKuSqsG2QL

— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) March 12, 2018

(HT: Chris Matyszczyk)